Wednesday, December 01, 2004

More Nonsense from PETA...
The Pantywaisted Eco Terrorist's Association (which tries to hide it's agenda through the clever use of an alternate definition for it's acronym - People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals), are all up in arms about, GASP!, cruel conditions IN A SLAUGHTERHOUSE.

Some people have too much free time on their hands, I know, but really!

Here's a link to the article, courtesy of Free Republic. com:

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/1291828/posts?page=18

Here was my response, written under my Freeper pseudonym of Wombat101:

The following is a public-service announcment:
Hello to all our friends at the Pantybunched Eco Terrorist's Association! Thank you for allowing me into your living room and for letting me give you this little talk entitled, "Meat; It's SO Damn Good..."

To begin with, you might well ask why is it that people eat meat? Well, typically because we have ethical and moral issues about eating anything that might talk back to us, for a start (which explains why you don't see parrot on many menus!). We also sorta-kinda have an aversion to eating anything that can either vote or shoot back at ya.

Now normally, since democrats can't vote properly or handle a gun, one might consider them fair game. However, it's been scientifically proven that democrat has no nutritional value. So, we're forced to look to other sources of food: cows, pigs, chickens, fish, etc.

Yes, they do look like very fine animals, don't they? Yes, a great many of them are cute, as well. However, one must understand that such animals were created and continue to exist as food sources. If it weren't for human beings taking the time to feed, provide medical care for and house and shelter these animals before slaughtering them, they'd be at the tender mercies of whatever four-legged predator might be out there. If given the choice, would you rather be torn to shreds by a mountain lion or clubbed upon the head until dead?

Now you can make all the arguments you want about slaughtering, and then eating, perfectly healthy animals -- the point is, we don't have to listen to them. We see the animals as food, and not as an individual entity with a consciousness. When cows start paying taxes, voting republican and programming VCR's on their own, I'll stop eating them.

Truth is, we love that last-minute, fear-induced rush of adrenaline that occurs in the animal just as it gets the death blow: it tenderizes the meat.

We also love all the wonderful animal by-proucts that make everyday life more livable; everything from shoe leather to glue, from baseball gloves to cowboy boots.
Killing animals for food is also enviornmentally sound, since on cow produces the same amounts of stomach gas, methane and carbon monoxide as the typical SUV. Removing cattle from the landscape reduces greenhouse gasses!

Slaughtering millions of chickens on a daily basis also prevents the potential spread of nasty avian diseases that affect humans, from SARS to Asian Bird Flu. These diseases kill hundreds in Asia every day!

What about all that animal waste that ends up in our water supplies? You think pesticides are the only thing that runs off a farm into the local streams and water tables? Why, right now, our water supplies are being threatened by incontinent sheep all over America!

So, you see, PETA, the business of meat is not just about getting us something to eat. It's about protecting the American way of life and promoting the promise of a better tomorrow. Now, go out there and get yourself a burger, and maybe you'll say: "Meat: it's so damn good!"

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