Saturday, June 04, 2011

115 Reasons Why Liberals Suck...

It's time to dust this one off again. I do it from time to time as the need becomes apparent, or because something occurs which reminds me of these time-honored maxims. Yesterday, that occurrence was the purchase of a gallon of milk.

So, there I am on the way home from the supermarket when I came upon the local gas station while waiting to cross the street. I took a look at the sign where the prices for a gallon of gas are posted, and saw that unleaded regular is going for $4.07 per gallon in this neck of the woods. Expensive, indeed. And then I thought about all the news coverage lately about those high prices, and about how all the rage these days is 'to go after' Big Oil for their 'price gouging' which 'hurts The Poor disproportionately', and then I remembered something:

I had just paid $4.59 for a gallon of fucking milk.

And then three seemingly random thoughts popped into my head:

A. Apparently it's quite acceptable to investigate and threaten Big Oil for charging exorbitant prices for what might be considered a luxury item, but why isn't anyone looking into Big Dairy for charging an outrageous price for a goddamned necessity?

B. What a curious convention that our 'Poor' have personal automobiles, and that they are, presumably, commuting to work with them. I figure if they're going to a job in a private automobile they ain't exactly poor in the same way as, say, someone living in Soweto, Mumbai, or Kabul would be considered Poor.

It would seem our notions of poverty have gone upscale; we must have the only poverty-stricken population on Planet Earth commuting to a job in a private automobile. I guess it would be an even-greater crime if they didn't have anti-lock brakes, air conditioning, and a six-speaker sound system?

C. Didn't President Frequent-Flyer-Miles pretty much promise us that under his steady hand gasoline prices would skyrocket? Isn't this, like, the only campaign pledge he's actually kept?

And then I figured out what was really going on; the hysteria over 'price gouging' and punishing Big Oil was, once again, just the Libtards at Work. And then that old maxim popped into my head about Liberals and skewed priorities. It's kabuki theatre intended to distract and mislead people so that they forget that the Libtards are presently presiding over a fucked up economy they vowed to fix, we're saddled with a $14 trillion deficit they refuse to address, ahem... labor under a persistent 9% unemployment rate, rammed  a monster Healthcare plan they still can't explain or pay for down our throats, we're going on two years without a Federal Budget, and they have started a third war after complaining vociferously for nearly a decade about two others. Amongst other things.

So, I figured that, once again, it was time to dust off the old 'Reasons Why Liberals Suck' post, add a few new ones, and repost it because people always seem to forget the simple wisdom contained within it. Consider it a public service.

Without further ado, I present "115 Reasons Why Liberals Suck".

(Ed. Note: This list originated in 2003 with 50 reasons why Liberals Suck. It's grown as the years have passed).

1. Liberalism is a movement of the well-intentioned, but ill-informed, led by the well-informed and ill-intentioned.

2. At heart, a liberal is an eternal adolescent, forever in search of escape from conventional morality, consequences and responsibility.


3. Freedom from moral consequence can only be secured by a collectivist, totalitarian state.


4. The Liberal religion worships the twin gods of The Government and The Genitalia.


5. A Liberal believes that psychology is a hard science in the same way that physics and chemistry are hard sciences.


6. Freedom, to a Liberal, refers solely to the freedom of the genitalia.


7. All non-sexual individual freedoms are despised by the Liberal because they contain within them an element of personal responsibility, self-sacrifice, or abstention.


8. Collectivism seeks to eliminate the need for personal responsibility and moral consequence by shifting blame for failure from the individual to "society" or "the System".


9. The Constitution and the Bill of Rights are the enemy of the Liberal. Because they are clear in their elaboration of both the rights of the Individual and the Powers of Government, both documents must be subverted, re-interpreted, or ignored, as needed.


10. The Liberal hates the United States because it has been the premier guarantor and promoter of individual rights in the history of mankind.


11. All institutions – schools, environMENTAL organizations, Civil Rights Groups, Law courts, Markets, etc., serve no relevant purpose to a Liberal except when they can be made to promote the concept of the collective.


12. Abortion is necessary to guarantee genital freedom and to further erode the concept of personal responsibility, while eliminating future generations of less-desirable human beings.


14. The Liberal must create an atmosphere of perpetual crisis, fear, and envy in order to justify continued collectivist oppression.


15. Religion is the enemy of the Liberal since it promotes morality and responsibility and suggests an authority set above Government.


16. Despite decades of failure, the Liberal clings to his collectivist ideology because it is HIS religion.


17. Liberals seek to dominate any institution that can be used to undermine or eliminate parental rights, such as schools, child-abuse agencies, pediatric associations, etc. and which can be used to turn children into informants for the State against their own parents.


18. The Liberal seeks to sanction and jail those who dare to home school their children, or who have the balls and wherewithal to raise their children in an environment outside of Liberal control or influence.


19. Individual ownership of firearms is the greatest threat to collectivism and the greatest expression of individual rights, therefore, all Liberals despise guns.


20. All freedoms demand responsible behavior. The Liberal despises responsibility, therefore, he despises freedom.


21. A Liberal worships his pantheon of Kennedys, Clintons, Cuomos, Jacksons, Gores and Obamas, for WHO they are, and in spite of WHAT they are.


22. The Liberal despises National Sovereignty, which is a guarantor of individual freedoms.


23. The Liberal promotes international government, such as the United Nations and the European Union, which seek to destroy National Sovereignty. The Soviet Union did not collapse, it merely moved west.


24. The Liberal is obsessed with the idea of centralized control of all human endeavors.


25. Liberals often speak of tolerance but can only tolerate other Liberals.


26. Liberals seek to criminalize any speech promoting responsibility, morality, or individualism as "hate speech" or sedition.


27. To a liberal, the thought cannot be separated from the deed -- unless one of his or her own is thinking or doing it.


28. Environmentalists lie as a matter of course, promoting paranoia based upon verifiable falsehood.


29. A Liberal’s only method of discourse is to insult and discredit all who disagree with him. Failing that, they attempt to draw attention away from the subject at hand by "moving on" and changing the subject.


30. Your freedom is a Liberal’s oppression.


31. Private property and wealth are disgusting and distasteful concepts to a Liberal -- unless they should have more than you do.


32. Liberals hate freedom-loving people with a passion bordering on mania.


33. The Liberal seeks to replace a moral world-view with an emotional one which can be more easily manipulated for political ends.


34. A Liberal claims to "care" for the homeless, mentally ill, lame, lazy and shiftless, but would never invite one of them into their own home.


35. The Liberal typically chooses a career – law, psychology, academic, bureaucrat, "activist", which produces nothing of value and which uses the power of government to extract the wealth of others.


36. Liberal "programs" enrich Liberals and screw the people they were purportedly supposed to help.


37. Liberals despise masculinity, as they view it as a symbol of individual freedom and power.


38. Feminist groups exist to promote lesbianism and socialism and have nothing to do with "equal rights".


39. The EEOC regularly invents incidents of racism and discrimination in order to justify its existence and to promote the collectivist ideals regarding employment and equality-of-outcome-type Liberal programs or thought.


40. Liberals despise suburbs as the manifestation of individual property and prosperity -- but seem to have no such qualms about gentrifying ghettos.


41. Liberals hate marriage and the family because they are institutions that strengthen the bonds between individuals -- leaving no room for collectivism -- and because they are institutions which frown upon immorality.


42. Liberals despise the automobile as a symbol of personal freedom.


43. Other diseases kill far more people, but Liberals are obsessed with AIDS because it is the consequence of promiscuity and immorality.


44. Liberal activities are driven by ego and a need for self-satisfaction. A liberal believes and does the things he does because he must prove that he "cares" more than you do.


45. Liberals thrive on emotion and die by reason.


46. Anything espoused by a Liberal as "for the children" is a direct assault upon your family, your privacy, your wallet and your rights.


47. Liberals have no compunction against using violence, deceit, or oppression if it furthers the collectivist cause.


48. Liberals are elitists who routinely exempt themselves from the very rules and suggested behaviors they impose on everyone else.


49. A Liberal must accept as an article of faith that my gun has killed more people than Ted Kennedy’s car or Janet Reno's ATF and FBI.


50. Liberals believe that Geraldo Rivera, Katie Couric, Dan Rather, and Oprah Winfrey are "journalists".


51. Liberals howl if a "protected" group is offended by speech or action, but will remain dead silent if the offended happen to be any of the following: Christians, White Males, Heterosexuals or Taxpayers.


52. Liberals believe wealth is static and quantifiable, and that that it should be divided equally. So, if I have "too much money", it follows that I must have stolen someone else’s "fair share".


53. Liberals believe that Richard Nixon was a vile criminal but that Stalin, Mao, and Fidel Castro are "progressive" leaders who had only the best of intentions.


54. All Liberal ideologies tend towards worldwide totalitarianism.


55. A Liberal is quite ready to point out misconduct by a member of a group opposed to them, but will routinely excuse even more vile behavior by their own.


56. Liberals are obsessed with the theory of evolution because the alternatives terrify them.


57. A full-time, stay-at-home mother enrages a Liberal.


58. Human life is cheap in a Liberal world.


59. The Liberal routinely changes the definition of a word to suit his purpose. For example, you have the "choice" to abort your unborn children, but not the "choice" of smoking, owning a gun, or buying an SUV.


60. A Liberal cannot conceive of a problem that cannot be solved without Government intervention. Although more often than not, Government Action created the problem in the first place.


61. Hillary Clinton's village is a totalitarian state: it used to be called the Soviet Union.


62. Given the chance, a Liberal would ban the Bible, Constitution, Declaration of Independence and Tom Sawyer as "hate speech".


63. Liberals view people as objects without moral motivation, thus we have the welfare state, abortion rights, etc. Conversely, they view inanimate objects in strictly moral terms, thus they are able to vilify and impart motives to firearms, cigarettes, SUV's, corporations, etc.


64. "Third Way" politics is a new shade of lipstick on the same Socialist pig.


65. Liberals are often intolerant, immature, violent thugs, laboring under the misapprehension that they do what they do for "social and moral causes".


66. The Liberal would sooner pluck out his own eye that to cut a tax.


67. Liberals still believe that Marx was right, despite the evidence to the contrary.


68. Hitler was a Socialist, not a Fascist and certainly NOT a Conservative. (See # 53 and #55).


69. Liberals believe that AIDS kills people because prevention and treatment services are underfunded, and not because people behave irresponsibly.


70. Liberals detest the death penalty, but favor abortion, thus setting up the convoluted idea that it’s okay to save the guilty and kill the innocent.


71. Liberals believe that trial lawyers are selfless heroes and that doctors are overpaid robber barons.


72. A Liberal believes that gender roles are "imposed by society" and that homosexuality is "normal" behavior.


73. A Liberal believes that business creates oppression and that Government creates wealth.


74. To a Liberal, self-esteem, the concept, is far more important than doing anything to actually earn some.


75. A Liberal regularly engages in symbolism because if he told the truth, no one would listen.


76. Liberals hate the NRA for their defense of the Second Amendment, and praise the ACLU for their perversion of the First .


77. To a Liberal, Taxes are too low and ATM fees are too high.


78. Racial profiling by police departments is wrong, but perfectly acceptable for deciding who gets into Law School.


79. The only difference between a Liberal and a Communist is that a Communist is AWARE of what he is doing.


80. Continued Liberal support for the shiftless, lazy, halt, lame, and crippled is necessary because they are the groups most easily manipulated by fear and envy.


81. Any proposal to build "low-income" housing is applauded by a Liberal, unless, of course, someone chooses to build it on the Upper West Side, or Malibu Beach.


82. In Liberal math, an 8% increase in government spending on any favored program rather than the usual-and-customary 10% increase equates to a 2% "cut" in funding, which somehow always results in someone starving or dying unnecessarily.


83. All of society’s ills can be cured by "education" inside a union-run institution that does no such thing.


84. All Liberals use words like "Ethnocentric", "jingoistic", "homophobic" and "trans-gendered" at least three times a day.


85. All Liberals have a primal urge to refer to any idea that they cannot comprehend -- or merely dislike -- as "sexist", "racist", "homophobic", etc.


86. A Liberal finds it perfectly acceptable to dispense condoms in a public school, but would cry bloody murder if the package had the Ten Commandments printed on it.


87. A Liberal advocates the killing of human beings (abortion) and the preservation of wildlife.


88. A Liberal feels that the only thing wrong with Communist States of the past was NOT that they were founded upon a flawed political ideology and engaged in awful repression, but rather that the results would have been far different if only the RIGHT Communists had been available to run them.


89. A Liberal believes that character doesn’t count...because they very often have none.


90. A Liberal will tell you that the First Amendment protects those that burn a flag, protest at a dead soldier's funeral, or beat up a Tea Party activist, and in the same breath, insist that Rush Limbaugh promotes "hate speech".


91. A Liberal would like to see the National Anthem replaced with the "Two Minutes Hate".


92. Liberals have such high opinions of themselves, their motives, and their ideas, that they would have you believe that the rest of us actually want to live in a world with dirty air and water, hip-deep in starving schoolchildren and dying elderly people..


93. Human nature does not exist to a Liberal, and when it routinely manifests itself, it is routinely ignored, and if possible, legislated and taxed.


94. Liberals view people in the same way a sculptor views a lump of clay, or a block of marble.


95. Liberals believe that man is inherently malleable and that all that’s needed is the proper training of man to enact to collectivist vision of the universe.


96. Loyalty is a concept foreign to most Liberals because it entails responsibility.


97. Ethics can be easily dispensed with in a Liberal world if they conflict with the creation of the collective.


98. Euphemism is the language of a Liberal, and symbolism is his modus operandi. Clarity and actual accomplishments are the enemies of Liberalism because Liberalism thrives on vagueness and the emotional aspects of "struggle".


99. Liberals believe that criminals should have more rights than law-abiding citizens.


100. Liberals routinely invent extra-Constitutional rights in order to further their agenda (i.e. abortion, gender and racial preferences, etc.) and routinely invent "repressed groups" in order to expand the power of the State (i.e. homosexuals, minorities, illegal immigrants, etc.) or to subvert the power of established institutions (i.e. the Church, family, nationalism, etc.).


101. Most Liberals would feel more shame in standing to attention during the National Anthem then they would in stealing from a Poor Box.


102. Socialism works...until you run out of other people's money.

103. A Libtard refuses to acknowledge that anything which breathes, eats, shits and multiplies from the moment of conception is alive. If those are not the most basic functions of Life, I don't know what is.


104. Libtards defend an economic policy which has consisted of taking $1.5 trillion out of the credit markets for bank bailouts and questionable Stimulus plans, keeping the printing presses at the Mint going 24/7/365, debasing the currency through "Quantitative Easing", spending tax dollars that have yet to be collected twice and then borrowing $5 trillion more in order to pay for programs which create no wealth, salable goods or products or private sector jobs, and which do not generate any tax income whatsoever is a responsible plan for 'recovery'.


105. Libtards subsidize poverty and advocate for policies which discourage productive work, denigrate the profit motive and capitalism, and then claim to be the champions and guardians of the very perpetual poverty class they've created.


106. Liberals believe that a man who simply reads the words written by others and fed to him by a teleprompter is the Greatest Orator since Cicero.


107. Government 'investments' are simply transfers of wealth that are intended to dispose of industrial surplus, resources, and labor, without that expenditure ever leading to a rise in real living standards. You could just as easily bake millions of loaves of bread, and then set them on fire to achieve the same effect, but it doesn't have the appearance of true economic activity.


108. Liberals believe that mortgage lenders are 'predatory' and people who don't read contracts or retain legal counsel before they sign on the dotted line are 'victims'.


109. Collective Liberalism promises equality of prosperity, but only produces equality of misery.


110.  Liberals are neither Truly Liberal or Democrats; they are shameless LIBERTINES who hate democracy because if given the choice of Collective Totalitarianism and Capitalistic Freedom, the people would select Freedom and Capitalism every time, leaving the Liberal out in the cold and needing to work for a living.


111. Liberals believe that people are incapable of changing their personal circumstances, or improving their lot in Life without an expensive and expansive government bureaucracy to 'help' them do it, usually at the expense of someone else.


112. Liberals believe all wars are evil and unwinnable...unless they start them. Then they're humanitarian efforts intended to promote good ends and altruistic ideals.


113. Liberals believe that when a terrorist is caught only because he fails to detonate his underwear on your flight, or fails to blow up his Pathfinder in Times Square, leaving his keys, cellphone, driver's license and address book behind in the glovebox, that the Homeland Security regime 'worked' to perfection.


114. Liberals believe that Terrorism is not an act of war perpetrated by a sick and violent culture, but rather law enforcement problem to be handled with civilian courts and Miranda rights....unless there's a bump in the polls to be had for shooting a terrorist in the face without a trial.


115. Liberals claim to stand 'for the Little Guy', but once the Little Guy's use as convenient political prop or rhetorical device is over, he is conveniently forgotten again.

UPDATE: You can view the latest update to this post -- 145 Reasons Why Liberals Suck -- HERE.

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

The Origin of the Terrorist Mindset, Scientifically Explained...Finally.

It's all the inbreeding married to an ideology founded by a child-molesting, sheep-shagging nomad, who both ate and wiped his ass with the same hand.

It's Supposed to Be Prison, Dammit!

Transgendered sex offenders? Maybe the world should have been destroyed last week, after all, huh?

Three questions:

1. Why is this person even still alive? Didn't HeShe kill HisHer Wife?

2. How long after HeShe gets HisHer way and has the taxpayer fund his genital reconstruction surgery, do you think we'll be hearing this piece of shit wants to be gay married?

3. What happened to the idea that prison was supposed to be about PUNISHMENT? It's supposed to be terrible, brutal, inhumane, and totally unconcerned with the inmates' notions of personal happiness! Otherwise, what deterrent value does prison hold?

I have a serious issue with this idea that a prison system is supposed to cater to an inmate's particular brand of mental dysfunction with taxpayer-funded surgery. Yes, we do have a moral and legal responsibility to ensure that inmates in our prisons have access to a relatively fair level of basic medical care, and those with serious mental issues do require and deserve all the help the state can offer, but at what point do we go too far?

What's next? Penile implants for prisoners? Baldness therapies? Plastic surgery?

You know this douchebag is only doing this because it's a way to 'get even' with the society that imprisoned him (almost all homosexuals engage in their behavior a means of rebellion against conventional society, and as a rejection of conventional morality), and because it might make him slightly more attractive to a better class of prison rapist (the kind that likes to cuddle afterwards, instead of just beat the piss out of you).

And of course, once this scumbag gets his way, HeShe'll have to be kept in a special cage, segregated from the general population, if only to keep HimHer alive. You have to wonder: at some point in all this stupidity, would someone go through all of this bullshit just to make his prison stay a bit more comfy? I mean, we're talking medcial mutillation here. Wouldn't doubt it; some people are that fucking crazy.

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Weiner's Weiner...

I almost threw up in my own mouth when I read this.

Rep. Anthony Weiner is both an insufferable twat and the most-aptly named man in Washington. He behaves in a manner that makes you want to stick an icepick through his eyeballs. Twice. Assuming that no one on Planet Earth could ever find a reasonable, defensible, logical or provable defense FOR anti-Semitism, Anthony Weiner could give them one just by opening his piehole (not that we advocate such a thing here at The Asylum. If you feel the undeniable need to hate someone, then please direct your hatreds at someone who might actually deserve it...like a Muslim.)

I've said before on these pages: New York State has the worst, dumbest, and most embarrassing Congressional delegation in American history.

This is how you know your elected officials are incapable of running a country: we live in an Information Age, where communications are instantaneous, and the ability to transmit and diffuse information at -- almost literally - at light speed is a fact of life. We live in an age of a 24-hour news cycle, with thousands of outlets constantly searching for any bit of anything that is even of the slightest interest, hungry for even more channels of input, and ways to devour more airtime at a profit. We live in an age where everyone and his dog has a video camera, recording device, cell phone, computer, and access to thousands, if not millions, of databases where they can record, store, examine and retrieve almost every fact of your life -- every utterance, every (you think) secret, every correspondence --from the most inconsequential to the greatest of All-Time-Biggest-Bonehead moves.

They should know these things are becoming the New Normal in our diseased modern culture, and that you cannot escape these traps...and yet our ruling class still does it, anyway.

John Edwards is quite possibly going to jail because he couldn't keep his pants zipped up, or a camera out of his bedroom, and it's only by the grace of whatever you hold holy that there was no such thing as Facebook or Twitter around for him to dig his hole any deeper.

And let's face it: someone is always out to get you -- your business or political rivals, your insurance company, anyone who wants to sell you something, your bank. No one has any reasonable expectation of privacy anymore, for the simple fact that everything is recorded, somewhere, and also because these new media often encourage people to volunteer in destroying their own personal privacy by allowing them to share the innermost secrets of their lives with others.

And somehow, these people -- your Ruling Class --  don't know this. Or worse, they know it, and just don't give a shit.

You would think that someone who's claim to rule over us peasants was based upon the presumptions of superior intelligence and integrity would be extremely circumspect about what he/she does on the Internet. But I guess not.

If this turns out to be true, and Rep. Weiner's Facebook account hasn't been hacked, then you have to wonder about his ability and worthiness to continue in office. In the grand scheme of things, sending a picture of your dong -- suitably covered -- to someone is probably not a hanging offense, but you have to know: given the ability of the Internet to keep people anonymous and diffuse that which one wishes to remain confidential, what would have happened if the recipient of this picture happened to be, say, a 14-yr old girl pretending to be someone she wasn't?

What if she did happen to be a 14 year old girl, and Weiner knew it? Sheesh! That's a whole 'nuther can o' worms, my friends! Doesn't anyone watch To Catch a Predator, anymore?

Unfortunately, I believe that Congressman Weiner will survive this little dustup, if only because New York City democrats (small 'd' intentional) have the mental capacity of dryer lint, and because politics in this city isn't based upon questions of Right and Wrong, or "What's good for the Country?" but upon "how much money can you steal for me, today?" and if Weiner has been even halfway decent in this regard with his constituents (i.e. partners in crime) then his minions will defend him with their very lives. Because he's a clueless and insufferable asshole, he'll just pretend as if nothing has happened and become twice the annoying and destructive dickhead that he was before.

As terrible as this sounds, I certainly DO hope this ended up in some 14-year old's mailbox, so that we could have a crime with which to charge this douchebag.

Then he can show his pecker to a whole new bunch of friends.

Pretty Girls Get Free Stuff...

No shit? Usually, though, the really pretty ones get husbands, engagement rings and three-bedroom Colonials-with-maid-service in the Suburbs. This chick held out for bus rides, cab fare and cake. Imagine what she could have gotten had she really been trying?

Personally, I am happy to give pretty girls certain bodily fluids that I'm otherwise not using and have no desire to keep, absolutely free of charge.

(H/T The Frisky.com)

Five Myths About Women in Combat...

More feminist douchebaggery from yet another woman who probably can't get promoted to the upper echelons of command because she doesn't have a Combat Infantry Badge.

Here's the solution, just don't ever expect to see it happen because it a) makes sense, and b) the spectacular failure that would follow would pit a stake through the rhetorical heart of yet one more feminist ideal, that there are no appreciable difference amongst the sexes. Feminism, as a political movement must, in order to merely survive logical scrutiny, insist that some things are indisputably true which simply aren't, while simultaneously arguing both for and against the very solutions that would put those ideals to the test.

It's a passive-aggressive thing: I insist this must be true, but don't you dare ever test my idea, just in case I'm wrong. The really important thing is that the argument continues for it's own sake.

Create an entirely female combat unit. Give it the best equipment, training, support and officers available, and then send it into combat against the enemy.

If you did that, either of the following things would soon become crystal clear:

a) Female infantrypersons can perform just as well as their male counterparts, defeating their enemies decisively at the point of engagement with superior weapons, tactics and effort, or

b) The body bags will start coming back in greater numbers...only with extra bumps in them. And a brand new crop of excuses for failure will bloom.

Otherwise, this argument is entirely academic and serves no useful purpose.

And by the way, anything that is championed by Rep. Loretta Sanchez is probably bad for everyone involved, except Loretta Sanchez. That woman is dizzier than the pet Yorkie that you spend your afternoons bashing over the head with a rubber hammer. I've seen her on television numerous times talking out of both sides of her mouth and her rectum simultaneously, and I'm convinced that she's a leading candidate for one of those great big red crash helmets you see all the kids on the Short Bus wearing.