I REALLY MISS GEORGE W. BUSH

You know what? I miss President Bush, and I'm tired of people still dissing him like he's some chump. Yeah Clinton was great, but who would you rather have had in office after that, Gore? Kerry?

With either of those guys as President, we would've been as lame as our neighbors by now. Don't get me wrong, I like Canada. They got free health care and poutine (which makes culinary sense). And Mexico...Mexico is warm.

Anyway, you need President Bush, like everyone else in this world does. Who else could have removed the threat in Iraq, trained the Iraqi people to defend their land, and instilled civility to a country? Who else would've given us stimulus checks in order to pump up the economy? If you don't like that, then you're most likely a Democrat...a crack-whore welfare Democrat.

Behold, my favorite President of the United States of America, in the greatest State of the Union Address ever. A speech you probably missed because you were busy hating him and wishing that your lives were miserable:




Have a good weekend...

*this post also appears at the Insane Asylum Blog*

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TEXAS JUDGE CRITICIZED FOR BEATING HIS DAUGHTER WITH A BELT

Seven years ago, Texas judge William Adams caught his daughter Hillary (who was 16 at the time) downloading music illegally from a website. So he did what any parent that believes in not sparing the rod would do. He disciplined her with his belt.

Hillary, unbeknownst to her parents, recorded the whole incident. She held on to the video over the years, but decided recently to upload it to YouTube in an attempt to make him "get help" according to her. She said that he's been harassing her over the years, and she wants him to stop. She doesn't go deeply in the details about the harassment, so I can't justify her uploading the video especially since she said the intent wasn't to get him trouble.

Five Reasons Why Rick Perry is a Major Douche...

I have an almost visceral dislike of Texas Governor and Presidential hopeful Rick Perry. I wouldn't go as far as to say that I actually hate the man, because I don't know him personally. Rather, my dislike is based upon certain politically-motivated factors which manifest whenever the man appears on television.

Here are Five Reasons why I believe Rick Perry is a Major Douche:

Herman Cain and Sexual Harassment...

By now everyone should have heard about Herman Cain's little trouble with some allegations of randiness. I won't recap the whole, sordid...ahem...affair, because the facts are still in question, as are the circumstances, and the story still needs some time to play out fully before comments are made by me.

Someone Hired Me?

With regards to the lack of content, recently:

I'm busy. I've got a new job (sort of) that I'm working on, and so far as I can tell, the only good point in it's favor is that I'll get to (legally) fleece Senior Citizens -- the second biggest community of mollycoddled crybabies in the United States (Baby Boomers come in first).

A Round of Applause for Mr. Chap...

Nicely done, Mr. C!

Mister Chap will be helping us keep our insanity levels at '1.000 mg of Thoraizine...stat!' .

He's a good man, a good writer, and a snazzy dresser, so lend him your eyes and your brains while he dishes out his own brand of expert-approved mental pablum. You can also visit him at the Insane Asylum.

You'd better....don't make me come up there and make you...

Welcome aboard, Mr. C, and thank you, thank you, THANK FUCKIN' YOU, for helping to destroy that totally-invented Kennedy aura that has done so much damage to our beloved Republic!

J.F.K., M.L.K., D.D.E. AND BLACK JESUS

[author's note: Allow me to introduce myself. I go by Mr. Chap, and I am the owner of the Insane Asylum website (http://www.insaneasylumblog.com/). At the Insane Asylum, we strive to make people think about the things they normally don't. From unbelievable news to politics, we cover the issues that drive our society.


I'm really honored that Matthew, who is an all-star contributor at the Insane Asylum, has given me the green light to write here. For the record, I do think I should let you know that I'm a sympathetic Grammar Nazi who is open to beginning sentences with "because" and "but", I rarely use curse words, and I'm also a serial comma killer.

Enjoy the ride...motherfuckers.]