Tuesday, January 20, 2009

History Begins Today...
Today is the Day of Days! All that has happened before is now irrelevant. It shall all be erased and forgotten, as it was a time of evil, selfish men, plotting the enslavement of us all in dark, secret chambers deep within the bosom of Mother Gaia, who nearly destroyed our planet with their industrial filth, and started wars brought on by their avarice, greed, sexual inadequacy and their primitive superstitious religious fervor.

All of this will soon be nothing but a very bad memory, like the sort that lingers after a nightmare. The Heavens Have Opened and Behold! A new Light has descended upon us who will cure the ills of the world. He will Stop the Violence and Heal the Planet. Choirs of Angels will be on every street corner, heralding the arrival of The One, spreading the word that Change We Can Believe In has finally come, and that all of mankind is welcome to join the transformative experience that gave Chris Matthews a tingly leg, and which promises to spend more money than actually exists in order to bring Everything to Everybody Everyday.

Barack Obama is to be sworn in as President of the United States today. Certainly a historic moment, but the way the media folks have carried on about it for damn-near a month now, I feel as if he doesn't feed the heaving multitudes in front of the Capitol with a couple of loaves and a fish right after he says "So Help Me God", while farting the score to "Hello, Dolly", I might be mightily disappointed.

After all "Yes We Can". Right?

I wish President Obama luck, as I'm not all a rainy day and because I have to live here too. But he will need more than luck if he's to navigate the rocks and shoals of the modern world, and I for one, am not convinced that he's prepared to do it. He basically ran a campaign which was a mirage; Obama could be anything you wanted him to be, depending on your mental state and pet peeve, but you could never pin him down on anything specific. But now he has to deliver, and catchy slogans and symbolism and retro-revolutionary rhetoric won't cut it. The rubber meets the road, right now.

There will be, we're told, four days of revelry in Washington, D.C., hearkening back to the days of the Imperial Triumphs, sans gladiatorial combat and adequate toilet facilities. Already the idiot box has been commandeered by the networks who have decided that I have need to know every minute detail of the whole thing, in real time, a week before it occurs. I hope that once this stupidity has run it's course that someone remembers there's a country to run and that they've elected someone who said he could do it.

And then, I want them to use the same amount of energy they used to get him elected, and the same amount they've wasted on reporting his every-waking-moment since Election Day in agonizing, painstaking detail, to hold him accountable. I won't hold my breath, since the media love affair with this man is bordering on psychotic, but, to coin an appropriate phrase "I have a dream..." that they will, especially after the media figures out it got suckered by this man, and then gets blamed for not telling us peasants about it beforehand.

After all, they have their credibility to protect, right?

Fingers crossed. I shan't be watching television for the next four days.

Update: The Fuhrer Oath as recited by the Obamatards earlier this week.

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