Someone out there on the frontiers of the Internet (specifically, it looks like the Northwest Frontier of a specific Southwest Asian Country, if you get my drift) has a serious issue. One so dreadfully acute that I fear it may be beyond the capabilities of modern medical science to correct it. This person might be forced, so as to spare future generations the pain and suffering that this sort of affliction will most certainly bring them, to commit suicide.
Personally, I would prefer that he would. I'll pay for the bullet, because this is an individual that might be too sick to continue living.
Of whom do I speak? Why, I'm talking about the sick bastard who keeps typing the words "nephew and my wife and we have to make fake sex picture" into his search engine. How do I know he's typing those words into his sex...errr...search engine? Because typing those words into Google or whoever somehow leads him to this website.
I get a report on it every day, and this person has done it every day for the last week.
Now, here's what's so incredibly fucked up about this situation (besides the obvious);
1. I'm pretty sure I've never blogged anything about nephew/wife sex.
2. I'm pretty certain I've never blogged anything about fake sex pictures.
3. I'm absolutely positive I have never written about anyone having to make a fake sex picture involving his wife and nephew under duress.
A quick Google Search of my own indicates that the reference, if any, to this site is fairly obscure (it ain't on the first 10 pages of responses to the search term), and even at that, I had to scrub with a Brillo Pad to scrape the imagined filth off my hands afterwards. I feel cheap for even havng investigated this.
I swear, the Internet is really strange and disgusting place, and there's some really disturbed individuals out there who need to be identified before they do great harm to society. Here's an idea:
Did you ever notice that when your newspaper or nightly newscast runs a picture of the latest Mad Dog Postal Worker, the most recent Pubescent Loser on a school shooting spree, or this week's serial elevator rapist, the photo they have never seems to be in focus? You get one with the guy in eyeglasses that are simply two full-moons of reflected light, or the photo is old and grainy and so you can't really make out the dude's features. Or the best, is when you get that combination of old, grainy, smudged features, but the red eyes stand out.
So, here's what I would suggest; I would take a photograph of every human being on Planet Earth. Thanks to Facebook, Google Earth and the Central London and New York City CCTV systems, this won't be as difficult as it sounds. We take all the photos in which no clear image was produced, and hunt down and kill the people associated with them...before they kill us, breed, or get the opportunity to type "nephew and my wife and we have to make fake sex picture" into a fucking search engine.