I have been neglecting this blog recently, and haven't been quite as productive as I would like. For those of you who depend upon this mental graffiti for information, for a good laugh, for something to think about (and really? I'm the best you can do?), I apologize for being, well...lazy.
In my defense; it IS Summer, you know, and I've been trying to get outdoors as much as I possibly can. For some reason it now seems imperative to me, in a way it never did before, to enjoy some warm weather. In years past I have been perhaps the biggest proponent of air conditioning that ever lived -- for I hate to sweat, and I truly despise the miserable sort of radiating-from-the-concrete heat that you get here in New York City -- but something has changed, and my opinion has undergone a complete 180 on the subject.
I believe this has something to do with my recent hospitalization. Since I escaped from the clutches of the medical profession several weeks ago, I have taken up some serious walking. Somewhere on the order of three-to-five miles a day, if I can manage it. I need to shed some excess blubber, and I've been trying to get in 60-90 minutes of exercise a day. It seems to be working, for while my weight has barely budged (because I still can't say no to Cheetos. That's next on the agenda), my joints and back have felt better than they have in ages. Perhaps in another month, I might contemplate an actual run?
The second excuse is that I'm spending time with my nephews this summer. Especially at the pool. My Boys will swim all damned day long, if you let them, from the time they get up until sheer exhaustion takes them. At least once a week for the past three weeks, I have joined them. My sister's pool is a wonderful place, all of a sudden, and not just because it's a convenient way to cool off.
I've also been back to therapy these last few weeks, as it appears a tune up was in order. Lately, I find myself growing constantly frustrated by a whole range of situations, which taken individually, seem petty, but when taken in their entirety add up to a lot of stress, and a desire to return to some of my old, destructive habits -- like drinking myself into oblivion, avoiding responsibility through complete apathy, shutting myself down and out from the rest of the planet (which doesn't seem to be such a bad thing when you get a good look at the rest of the Planet, but unfortunately, we must deal). Suffice to say, we're making progress: I knew enough to recognize the signs, and that was the first step to getting a handle on things again.
Hadn't seen a therapist since 2005 before this latest anxiety episode, so I guess I was doing pretty well, and will again.
The final reason I've been away from my keyboard is because I just haven't been in the proper mindset to write much. The world seems suspended in amber at the present, like a prehistoric mosquito, and there doesn't seem to be much use in the usual litany of "We're Screwed as a Nation/Culture/Species", "Obama Sucks", "You People Need to Be Locked Up" type screeds that get me the pageviews and the belly laughs. There's no juice in it these days, for after nearly four years of the seriously spirit-crushing Obamanation Regime, three months out from an election, time seems to be creeping forward at the same speed at which your grandfather's arteries are hardening.
I wish we could hold the freakin' election today, just so that there would be more -- and something potentially cheerful -- to talk about. I wish that something truly inspiring would happen, so we'd have something to take our tiny minds off our troubles for just five minutes. Apathy and inertia seem to be the watchwords of Modern Society, at least at this point in American History.
However, I am of a mind to do something about this. I very often discover new things or get hit across the head by an idea for a blog post in my day-to-day travels. These are the sorts of "can't make this up" slices of life dramas that easily lend themselves to a few thousand words -- and much sarcasm -- simply because they are unexpected, and therefore, interesting. Although I hate to say it, seeing as how I actually AM getting out more, but...
...I need to get out more.
So, once again, I apologize for being uninspired and lazy with the blogging thing, and promise I'll be doing more to bring you the questionable point of view of this complete Lunatic, on everything and everything under the Sun, just as soon as I spend some more quality time ...ummm, errr...under the Sun.