Saturday, December 06, 2003

Snow, snow and More Snow!
It's snowing something fierce here in the People's Repbulic of New York -- by my guestimation we have about 7" on the ground now, forecasts are for up to another foot of snow by tomorrow night.

Four things about snow:
1. I love the shit out of it -- Snow seems to have a quieting effect on everything around it. If you've ever been walking through deserted streets with a light snowfall coming down, you know what I mean. Sound seems muffled, nerves seemed smoothed over. The quiet is both eerie and relaxing at the same time. If it were up to me, we'd have snow falling perpetually, just for the peace and quiet it seems to bring.

2. It's a pain in the ass -- Shovelling, scraping, slipping, sliding, etc., etc. Snow, for all of it's other soothing qualities is about as annoying as a Clinton proclaiming their innocence. It's a chore to get rid of it, especially if you have bad back like I do, and no matter what you do to get it out of the way, Nature conspires to blow it back over whatever you just cleared. If it doesn't freeze, get rained on (creating slush -- third nastiest substance know to man; the other two are snot and that black, crusty stuff you find under the ketchup bottlecap), and it can never be totally eliminated except by evaporation -- meaning warmer weather.

3. The obligatory phone call -- from both my landlord and the condo board, reminding me to clear the snow from my terrace, lest it collapse under the weight. Gee, you pay maintenance fees you'd think someone would do it for ya. I guess it's just the price we pay. Yes, I'm fully aware that the weight of a foot of snow could have serious effects upon the structural integrity of this cardboard hovel, thank you. Now that I've just cleared the FIRST snowfall, I'll prepare myself for the SECOND. A never ending job, it seems.

4. Snowball fights -- self explanatory. Nothing like pelting your nephews with a cold, wet projectile.

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