Friday, July 09, 2010

How Would You Fix It? Part I

Here are some suggestions about how to correct the biggest problems our country faces today. They will have the virtues of being direct and unencumbered by either sensitivity, or Political Correctness. Sensitivity is for brain-addled Libtards, and Political Correctness is for those unable to grasp verifiable, and often ugly, truths because of the psychic pain and guilt it inflicts upon their fragile little metrosexual psyches. Truth often hurts -- it should. Without a foundation of truth, no problem can ever be identified, let alone solved.

This is but the first installment. I plan to have three installments in the series.

I will get an inbox full of venom, I'm certain, because my solutions spare no one's feelings. In fact, they don't even take anyone's feelings into account. Actually, so far as I'm concerned, everytime I get a nasty e-mail from a panty-bunched, bed-wetting, thumb-sucking, metrosexual Citizen of the World (i.e. Libtard), I will reward myself with a nice Milky Way Bar, if only because I would regard the epithets of hater, homophobe, xenophobe, racist, sexist, anti-this-that-and-the-other as great big shiny badges of affirmation, and I won't be able to find anyone able to produce the medals I'll deserve to have pinned to my chest for it all fast enough.

None of what I advocate will ever be done, because it just makes too much sense and goes against the grain of both political parties, in that they would all eliminate the possibility of graft, and put an end to the tired old game of allowing politicians to pontificate and posture without actually having to do anything.

So, here you go. You don't have to agree, but you do have to deal with it. In no particular order;

A) Illegal Immigration: 1. Build a nice, new, open-air prison in the New Mexico desert (where they used to do all the nuclear testing). Ensure that it has no buildings, an inadequate water supply, and just the very barest rudiments of sanitation. Make sure it's in the hottest,most-radioactive portion of the desert you can find, and fence it in with razor wire and landmines. Once there, captured illegal aliens will be kept until they can be "repatriated" to their country of origin.

2. Place 50,000 troops along the southern border, equipped with packs of snarling, vicious attack dogs trained to leap into action at the first scent of chipotle. Give the troops "shoot-to-kill" orders, so that when the Invaders from the South ignore their three warnings to turn back, you can show them we mean business.

3. Those fortunate few who manage to evade the minefields, dogs, machine-gun nests and snipers by surrendering, or being granted mercy by the Border Patrol and Marines, or just got themselves slightly wounded, will be shipped to that lovely open-air resort in New Mexico I've just mentioned, where they can bake in the heat and prey upon each other under the sight of machine-gun-armed watch towers.

4. The President of the United States (not this one, because he hasn't got any balls) will make a public announcement; if you're in the country illegally, you will have 90 days to see to your personal affairs, and then yo9u can get the hell out of the country. If you don't, we've got a nice vacation in New Mexico planned for you, where you will branded upon the forehead and hands to make it easier for us to identify you again, just in case you decide to try sneak north one more time.

5. Alert all business owners in the US that the fines and penalties for illegally hiring illegal aliens will be trebled. Remind them of the old capitalist axiom that if you can't stay in business without breaking the law, you probably shouldn't be in business --and then put them out of business permanently.

6. Eliminate "Birthright Citizenship" for any child born in an American hospital in cases where at least one parent (to be determined by DNA testing) is NOT a citizen or legal resident.If that qualification cannot be met, ship mother and child to the new Disneyland in New Mexico as a birthday gift, just as soon as that's medically feasible.

7. Tell the President of Mexico to run his own goddamned country, and to keep his tubercular peasantry on his side of the fence. In days past, a mass-migration of the sort that is common on the southern border used to be called "an invasion", and was resisted by military force.

8. The State Department will stop handing out visas, to anyone, like candy. No visa will be approved without an adequate background check on the potential recipient, and if takes a decade to complete it, that's just too bad.

9. Make English the Chief Lingua Franca of the United States. Government at all levels will no longer pay for bi-lingual education. It will no longer print, transmit, distribute or provide any service or form written/conducted in anything but English, unless doing so is necessary to maintain public order and safety, or is deemed to be in the national interest.

10. Set up a $5 billion prize to go to the first asshole who manages to genetically engineer a head of lettuce that can be picked by a machine.

B) War on Terror
1. The recent "disappearance" of 17 Afghans brought to the United States for training is indicative of something our political leadership has failed to grasp. If we assume that those 17 men were considered to be the best-and-the-brightest that Afghanistan had to offer, then the lesson of their desertion is that a) they won't fight for their freedom or country, and b) they have no interest in helping to build a better future for their country, families, or culture. If we're losing in Afghanistan, then this is a remarkably clear reason of why; even the best Afghans don't give a shit -- the rest are simply fighting for their centuries-old right to be wife-beating, animal-molesting, opium-smoking, piss-poor, praying-five-times-a-day douchebags. I suggest a new strategy that I like to call "Fuck 'em. Scorched Earth", and then leave.

2. The sectarian violence in Iraq continues, because a) we're protecting the next generation of Saddam Husseins with American guns, b) Islam is a murderous ideology which preys upon the unaware and defenseless, and since Rumsfeld's "Dead-Enders" couldn't whack the Great Satan's military, they're more than content to whack each other. Every IED, every marketplace bomb, every mortar attack on a city center is training for the various forces in Iraq who are just waiting for us to go home so that they can fight each other for the honor of being the next bunch of dumbasses to challenge the United States again...and lose again. New Strategy -- Fuck 'em. Scorched Earth and then leave.

3. Iran should not have a nuclear weapon. Period. If that means the only places left to hear the Farsi language spoken is in the depths of Hell, then so be it. If that means that the only traces of Persian culture left anywhere is whatever is to be found in museums, then that's too bad, as well. The idea that there's a nascent "democratic" movement in Iran (the one the "experts" have been talking up for 3 decades now) was crushed in the streets of Tehran last year, and even if it had been successful, it would only have brought "reform" at the margins of Islamic life. There are no "moderates" in a theocracy. New negotiating Strategy; Fuck 'em, Scorched Earth.

4. Pakistan is NOT our Ally; it is the biggest failure of British foreign policy in history, and is nothing but a bubbling cauldron of anti-Western hatred, murder, duplicity, and has perhaps the worst smelling people on Earth. New approach to Pakistani relations; Fuck 'em. Scorched Earth.

5. Saudi Arabia is NOT our Ally; they simply like our money -- and like the Germans --would rather that the United States pay for it's defense. That just means more money for the thousands of Saudi"princes" to waste on the non-Islamic delights of the West -- Booze, blonds, gambling, drugs, and porn -- that they can't get at home. Saudi Arabia is a den of pious hypocrites presiding over a mass of camel-raping nomads. Basis for a new Saudi relationship; Fuck 'em. Scorched Earth, then leave.

6. No change for the good in the Islamic world will come from US. It must originate with THEM. An entire culture, millenia-old, must be transformed. That transformation will not happen because Americans built schools and roads; it'll happen only when the consequences of NOT changing are made apparent, like when half the Middle East is a smoking crater. Ask the Japanese and Germans -- both once on the receiving end of the Fuck 'Em, Scorched Earth policy -- how that worked out.

7. realize that many of the "Security Measures" put in place since September 11, 2001 are really restricting the freedoms of Americans more than they are hindering terrorists. Security efforts should be redirected towards stopping and going after REAL terrorists. If this means racial profiling of certain individuals and groups, then that's the price we need to pay for security, and the price they pay for not turning their murderous relatives in to the authorities.

8. Terrorists do not recognize anyone else's Human and Civil Rights, international borders, thenicities of the Rule of Law, or the rules of basic decency, therefore, they are entitled to the same measure of regard.

9. Declare that any terrorist attack on the United States and it's allies will result in immediate retaliation against every terrorist or organization within reach of American power, regardless of whether any particular group was responsible for that attack or not. Just kill every terrorist within reach.

C) The Government
1. Shut down the Federal Government -- except for really essential services -- for three months out of every year. Send the overpaid union slobs for the government home for a nice, long vacation without pay.

2. Pay every federal worker the minimum wage that their democratic party lapdogs advocate so loudly for. Give raises to them based solely on merit, which in a Federal Bureaucracy usually means someone can count to 20 without removing their shoes and socks.

3. Close the Department of Education (which educates no one), the Department of Housing and Urban Development (think: does the typically American "urban" look "developed" to you? HUD is a welfare housing scam), phase out the Post Office (e-mail is free, you know), consolidate every "Civil Rights Division" in every federal department within the Department of Justice (why do the Department of Transportation and the HHS have "Civil Rights" divisions?), immediately revoke every Executive Order, Signing Statement or Presidential Dictate and such that have the names Barack Obama, William J. Clinton, or James Earl Carter on them.

4. Stop the whoring of the political class, and publicly fund elections, with a reasonable cap on campaign spending (this might be one of those few ideas Libtards have that I can agree with).

5. Repeal the McCain-Feingold Tenure for Elected Offcials....err...Campaign Finance Reform Act.

6. Encourage the electorate to throw every remaining Aging Hippie and decrepit Cold Warrior out of Congress. They are hopelessly stuck in the past and nothing short of dynamite -- or unemployment -- will convince them that they live in the 21st Century now.

7. Make having passed the Bar Exam or having once practiced Law a disqualification for public office.

8. If there's a mandatory retirement age for the rest of us, there should be one for Congresscritters, too.

9. Someone should be tasked with going through the Federal Register and immediately repeal any law or regulation that has been superseded by technology, or which has not been enforced in any meaningful way since 1970, so long as doing so does not compromise public health or safety,or represent a danger to Civil Liberties.

10. No member of Congress should be allowed to become wealthy while in Public Service. They should be required to place all of their assets into blind trusts, post monthly financial statements, and as soon as a Congresscritter announces an income of $1 million or more, they should be investigated to find out just how they got it.

11. Declare that Congress will no longer be allowed to borrow money without there first being a National Emergency, declared by a 2/3 majority vote in both houses.

12. Add a Balanced Budget Amendment to the Constitution. Not balanced in the "out years", not balanced by accounting tricks, not anything that describes a "reduction in the rate of spending growth" sort of fantasy, but a mathematically provable balanced budget which can be audited by standard accounting methods, and which requires that spending be balanced by cuts.

13. No more Earmarks. No more sneaking transportation Bills into Education Bills, and other tricks. No more changing Congressional rules to suit the needs of either party at any particular moment. Every Member of Congress should be required to post their daily activities, votes and positions on a publicly-accessible website available 24/7/365 so that the voters know what they're up to. Every memeber of Congress should have a microchip implanted in them so that we can find them 24/7/365, to be removed when one leaves office.

14. No tax hikes without a 2/3 majority vote of both houses.

D) The Economy
1. Repeal ObamaCare and it's attendant taxation.

2. Demand repayment of all TARP funds by a date certain, with interest.

3. Do not spend the remaining "Stimulus Money". There were no "shovel-ready" projects so much as there were democratic party allies to be paid off, and the majority of the cash is still in the pipeline. Might as well put it back into circulation so that the credit markets aren't quite so tight.

4. Declare "Tax Holidays" where the Federal government will not collect any personal income taxes whatsoever. Say, two or three months out of every year, anytime after April 15th. Put money back into the consumer's hands and let it work it's magic.

5. Declare a Tax Amnesty where anyone who owes back taxes and is NOT being investigated for criminal activity can be given the opportunity to reach a reasonable settlement with the government. The IRS should be designated as a Terrorist Organization.

6. No Inheritance Taxes. You already paid taxes while alive, you shouldn't have to anymore after you've died.

7. No Capital Gains Tax on any profit of less than $100,000.

8. Re-instate the Glass-Steagall Act, and make the mega-financials divest themselves of their conflicted interests. There will be no more "Too Big to Fail" after that. Allow the Bankruptcy laws to operate the way they were intended to when a corporation goes into default.

9. Get the Federal Government out of the Mortgage Business; dissolve Fannie and Freddie and liquidate their assets.

10. Promote policies which will bring a return of the manufacturing sector to American shores. Since the United States cannot compete in the field of "cheap" manufacturing because of lower wages around the world, the thrust of these policies must be the promotion of High-Quality manufacturing processes. If Americans can't make it cheaper than anyone else, then we can damned well make it better than anyone else! As the saying goes, "Cheap usually turns out to be expensive", so you might as well make it worth the customer's while to spend the extra money for the good stuff.

11. Develop an energy policy which is high on nuclear, clean coal and natural gas (i.e. domestic sources), and not-so-hot on petroleum. Stop the Ethanol Subsidy, because it is actually stifling creativity in the area of alternative fuels..Announce a government-sponsored $5 billion prize to the first person or organization that can produce both a viable alternative fuel, and an engine which can run reasonably-efficiently and reliably on it.

12. Destroy the Progressive Income Tax Code, and start over from scratch. No more giving "Tax Credits" to people who don't pay taxes, no more loopholes or special regulations. Simply state that the Federal Government will take x-percentage of your total gross income (salary, tips, wages, capital gains), and not a penny more, regardless of income level.

13. Pass tough Tort Reforms and get the lawyers out of the Boardrooms, Factories, Hospitals and off my television set.

14. Pass a law declaring the United States is a Right-to-Work Nation, and bust the unions which artificially skew the wage scales, prevent the free circulation of labor, and who are buying politicians with their member's money.

15. Lower Corporate Tax rates to make American business more attractive to investors, foreign and domestic.

16. No VAT taxes.

Make of this what you will.

Tomorrow in Part II, I'll tackle Race Relations, Energy, The Two-Party System and the BP Oil Spill.

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