Once again, I've scanned my Blogger stats for this past week, and not surprisingly, I've found yet more evidence that mankind is, indeed, doomed. If we're lucky, we'll all die in a nuclear winter, or by some super influenza, or perhaps be hit by a comet trapped in the Earth's gravitational pull, but the alternative -- based on some of the incredibly sick shit I see in these stats -- is too painful to contemplate; a inexorably slow decline by genetic degeneration.
Of course, it's not all doom-and-gloom. If one has a sense of humor, you might find something to laugh at in all this human frailty and insanity. I often do, and I always like to share it with you!
You can see the results of last week's stat search here.
The top search terms that brought you to this site this past week were:
1. "Donkeysexe", or variations thereof - still Numero Uno, and all set to maintain a strong showing for years to come! Those of you looking for such things are, indeed, unfit to continue breeding, or you might need to be locked up to protect society, in general.
An interesting twist on this week's donkeysexe stats is that not a single hit on this term came from the Middle East (the statistically-dominant segment of donkey-lust aficionados). I wonder if this is because I posted my discovery that this term was being used predominately by "good" Muslims, or because I alerted the Islamic censors to the little trick of spelling "sex" with an extra "e" to spoof the filters, who then cracked down on the practice. If so, some poor dickhead in Saudi is probably having his pecker lopped off in the public square, right now. I'd apologize, but screw you: you're a sick bastard.
Or perhaps there was a really good "Death to America" rally somewhere in Pakistan and folks just didn't have enough time to diddle themselves to images of donkeys in various sexual motifs, what with all the flag burning and Jew-bashing to be done.
However, there is a strong indication that this is still popular in some precincts of Canada and Luxembourg. What's wrong with you people?
2. "Firemen Jerking Off, or Firemen Caught Jerking Off" - apparently, there are firemen out there playing with an altogether different variety of hose, and the word "pumper" must now take on an entirely new meaning. Yet another sick sexual fetish that makes one despair for the future of the human race.
I shudder to think of what might be going on in fire houses all over the planet! Why, if it wasn't for arson, these guys would probably be splooging each other within an inch of their lives every day.
3. A Surprise Entry this week was the search term "Danny Glover Racist" which surprised me for two reasons; first, I don't remember blogging anything about Danny Glover at all -- but I must have at one time or another -- and secondly, someone still remembers who Danny Glover is.
4. Making a respectable showing this week was the new search term "Obama(s) Asshole". Now, I do admit to having called President Odouchebag an asshole once or twice, but I most certainly do not recall ever having blogged about his asshole, specifically. Could it just be that some people are incapable of spelling "Michelle Obama" or "Rahm Emmanuel", or perhaps just too lazy to do so?
5. Another surprise entry in the "You people are fucking disgusting" category was the term "Dingleberry". I very rarely use this word, except as a synonym for "John Kerry". I would hate to think that someone typed this word into their Google search under the mistaken impression that it's a breakfast cereal, or the latest weight-loss fad, and therefore, I have to assume that people who used it are actually interested in the Dingleberry itself.
Apparently, it's very popular in Brazil. As to why, I have no clue, and am almost fearful about making a guess.