I haven't been writing much of late! And what I have written looks, in retrospect, like poop because I haven't devoted enough time to detail. But, I have an excuse, you see; I've been sorta-kinda busy trying to find work...again.
It gets increasingly difficult every time the search begins/renews. I'm getting old; I have bad knees and a bad back, so physical labor is out of the question. The skills I do possess are totally out-of-date because I haven't been able to put the to productive use for quite a while. I've been reading an awful lot about older men like me taking advantage of all sorts of grants for "re-training" but I never seem able to find any of this stuff. It leads me to believe that most of it is bullshit -- propaganda of the sort that's common these day, like "the Stimulus is Working!", or "Another job saved or created!".
What few leads I have followed in this "re-training" scheme seem to end as soon as I get to the part of the application that says "Check race"...and there's no "White" box. Or "Check Primary Language" and "English" is like seventh of eighth down the list. The sea of minority faces in the room is usually the giveaway, and all the people speaking Spanish are usually a dead giveaway.
I'm certain if I was Black, Hispanic -- or had tits -- the government would be more than happy to "help" me by making me a ward of the state. However, last time I looked, white men get to pick up the tab for that sort of thing; not take advantage of it. Besides, I really want to work, and to work at something that really counts or matters.
I'm thinking of starting some sort of volunteer work, just to get out of my own head and have something to do, and from what I hear, many people are somehow spinning that sort of thing into "careers" (by which I guess they mean "non-profit" jobs, which ultimately depend either upon charity or government funding. Screw that; I just need to be occupied).
Anyways, I'll keep plugging away, if only because I still have some shreds of self-respect, and I've always been too dumb to walk away from fights. Hey, I hear there's a Congressional set available in New York...you just have to keep your hands off you male co-workers. I think I can hack that.