Thursday, September 09, 2010

On "Burn a Koran Day"...

Vis-a-vis the moron preacher and his stupid little publicity stunt. I'm still not linking to anything concerning this stupidity if only because doing so might actually raise this asshole's profile, and convince him (and his brain-dead legions) that they're worthy of being taken seriously. But, there have been a couple of ideas bouncing about the empty space between my ears about this nonsense that I just MUST put on record. These thoughts are not fully formulated (I haven't the time right now), so I'm sure there's some holes in my thinking.

1. Armageddon - people like this "Reverend", and most Evangelicals in general, are obsessed with Armageddon. They wish to bring about "The End of Days" in the selfish belief that they, alone, will be "saved" when the human race finally goes the way of the dinosaurs, and just about everything they do or advocate is colored by this stupidity. This idiot will not be deterred by plaintive wails for restraint, nor reasoned discourse, because it is his mission (just who imparted this authority upon him is an open question; he'll, naturally, say that "God" gave it to him, but unless the Almighty decides to make her presence known and announce otherwise, there is no way to verify this claim, and so Reverend Douchebag avoids the necessity of having to provide any proof of his deputation). We're not dealing with a rational man; we're dealing with a lunatic.

I don't believe that Reverend Asshole is simply engaging in his First Amendment right to protest or express his religious beliefs, nor do I believe that his tactics are part of some Divine Plan; I believe it's a deliberate provocation aimed at starting the Final Battle between Good and Evil for the purposes of bringing about the Rapture. Reverend Dickhead has taken it upon himself to light the fuse on the powder keg that will destroy the world for the sake of his own Salvation.

Of course, if he were a REAL Man of God, he would realize that God Herself will bring these events to pass in Her own good time, and under Her own conditions. One does not nudge the Almighty into action, and thinking you can is perhaps the greatest sin of all -- Pride. Let's see Reverend Nosepicker explain that one away when, after his little publicity stunt, no Third World War or Rapture-like event actually occurs, the Almighty apparently unconvinced by his show of flaming devotion.

For all his zeal about the True Faith and the Evils of Islam, Reverend Asswipe is no different than many of his enemies in this regard, Ahmadinijad, Bin Laden, Khomieini, and so forth.
People like this are simply too stupid and dangerous to live, and while I don't advocate that anyone go out and do Reverend Scumbag any harm, the next best thing is to simply ignore him and the flock of douchebags that follows in his wake. They're not capable of a solitary thought that doesn't originate in the so-called Good Book. I may be an agnostic, but I have read it, you know (unavoidable during 10 years of Catholic school education), and Revelations sounds to me more like the diary of some idiot's bad acid trip than it does the Word of God.

I also can't see how one reconciles the "Fuck you, we've been saved! Have a nice time in Hell, Sinners!" nature of the sort of Left-Behind Rapture these idiots envision with the Christian exhortation to "Love Thy Neighbor", or even the arrogance of believing that God will save them above all others, but then again logic was never the strong suit of the insanely religious. Frankly, if Heaven was full of insufferable Evangelicals, I'd rather be some place else, thank you.

2. No Graven Images - the Commandments say that there shall be no graven images of God, and by extension, no bestowal of mystic or supernatural power to inanimate objects. This was, in fact, one of the greatest complaints of Protestants (from whom Reverend Fuckhead's brand of Evangelicalism sprouted from) against the Catholic Church. The idea that icons, relics and saints cannot have, nor can invoke, the power of God for the purposes of Man was one of the hallmarks of the Protestant movement, and was used as an example of the worst abuses and superstitions of the Catholic Church.

It's still one of the most misunderstood of the Commandments; we still impart holy power on everything from books to statues to buildings to land. One of the greatest causes of strife in the world -- the contest for the Holy Land -- would have been laughed off by the early Protestant fathers as a Fool's Errand: the Land itself could not be Holy, for that would be a sin to believe it was. This is a belief that's been held in many orthodox Jewish sects, and is even prevalent in some aspects of Islam. If the very land that God-made-flesh walked upon isn't strictly-speaking sacred, how can a fucking book be?

Ah, but here's the rub: while (some) Protestants believe the power of God is not to be found in inanimate objects, their ENEMIES certainly do. By destroying their enemies' graven images they are actually doing the world a favor, they think. You are no more destroying the power of Islam by burning a book than your forebears destroyed the power of the Catholics when they broke stained-glass windows and destroyed statues of the Virgin. There's more Catholics than Protestants and Evangelicals on the planet, so that strategy apparently worked real well, didn't it? The power to destroy an object does not destroy the power of the ideals represented by said object.

Go ahead and burn a Koran, if you want, but it won't shake anyone's faith any more than science, logic and reality have shaken yours, Reverend Bedwetter. The answers to all of life's problems and contradictions aren't contained in a book written by human beings with a slew of mental disorders and an agenda. You can call it "wisdom" or "prophecy", but it doesn't make any of it true, or even often useful. Somehow, I doubt anyone who professes "faith" in anything will agree with me on that one, but there it is.

3. I'm not defending Islam at all. I think it is one of the most corrosive inventions of mankind, ranking right up there with National Socialism, Communism, Disco, the Pet Rock, Jimmy Carter, the Nehru Jacket and the idea of Hillary Clinton as "The Smartest Woman in the World". I've only said it a million times here; if it were up to me, there would be no Muslims at all. and while I have advocated for a Muslim genocide, the truth of the matter is that the fall of Islam. and all that comes with it.,will probably be brought about by cultural change long before it will be by either war or some Holy Pyromaniac. Islam doesn't die if you burn a book: it only dies when Muslims decide it's an anachronistic piece of crap that hasn't brought them anything useful, in much the same way that modern feminists are finding that Gloria Steinem, Betty Friedan and Naomi Wolf were all full of shit, and have done more harm than good.

I'm certain the Reverend Jerkoff wouldn't lose his faith if his church burned down, or if someone pissed on his Bible, so Revered Dingleberry is ultimately engaged in a useless act that will not change anyone's mind, or shake anyone's faith. It'll probably bring him more followers and donations, but that is probably his ultimate goal...unless he happens to trigger the Rapture in the meantime.

4. It's the 21st century; why do we still burn things? Are we still naked savages in awe of the mystical power of fire? They burn shit in some tribal-like mystical experience in places where civilization hasn't yet taken root, like New Guinea, the African jungles, and...the Islamic World. The act of burning something seems to have once possessed magical powers to people who hadn't discovered the wheel or hygiene (and who still haven't heard of such things), but this is America, crown jewel of the Modern Age (at least until Obama is done with it), and we're not snake-handling natives, although Reverend Asshat and his followers probably come pretty damned close.

Reverend Boy-Buggerer is in danger of becoming that which he so obviously hates.

As the saying goes "Pride cometh before the fall..." Have a nice trip as you're hoisted upon your own petard, Reverend.

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