Monday, January 18, 2010

Douchebag of the Week (1/1810): Harry Reid...

It is only fitting that, on Martin Luther King Jr. Day, that Harry Reid should be named as the Douchebag of the Week.

Light-skinned black men everywhere agree, Harry is the very pinnacle of clueless douche-ness. His 'insensitive' (now the truth is insensitive if it's inconvenient) remarks about President Obama's racial heritage, his ability to move between Ghetto and Middle-Class culture without alarming Whitey, and his penchant for turning the Jive Talk (The infamous Negro Dialect) on and off in relation to his audience was considered in some quarters retro racism, and in others, simply Harry having a Senior Moment.

Personally, I think it was Harry just giving voice to the thoughts that roll around in every liberal's (small 'l' intentional) head. The filter got removed; Harry forgot to control his mouth for a second, he had a brain fart, and in those few, brief seconds, all you needed to know about how liberals really feel about black people came flowing out. It's interesting to note that Joe Biden fell into the same trap with his "clean and articulate" routine, and Bill Clinton (allegedly) told Teddy Kennedy that in another time and place Barack Obama would "be fetching us coffee..." all more or less during the same time frame. Racism in the 21st century seems to have a home in the dark recesses of the liberal heart and mind.

Those sorts of actions and statements are both an unconcious admission of liberal bias and the fact that, really deep down, even they consider Obama little more than a flim-flam man, and even they can't believe he actually won.

The only truly "shocking" thing about the whole incident is that Harry had enough control over his faculties to at least not call Obama "boy".

Of course Conservatives called for Reid's resignation as Senate Majority Leader, hoping to equate the apparent racism of Reid to the apparent racism of Trent Lott in one of those ticky-tack-tit-for-tat pissing matches that characterize the politics of this sort of thing. Fat chance. Being a democrat means you can be an out-and-out racist but be forgiven your sins if you vote for enough welfare. It's sort of like Affirmative Action Racism for White People. The only thing sorrier than the sight of conservatives demanding parity in who gets fired, was Harry Reid trotting out the "some of my Best Friends are black routine..." beginning the dog-and-pony show, naturally, with a prayer session starring Je$$e Jackass.

The Dog-and-Pony-Show always starts with Je$$e; he's the only black man in America, you know. The whole miasma surrounding the subject of race makes me thoroughly sick, and reminds me that there are people in this country who have way too much free time on their hands because this is all they have time for, and it's all they live for, it's what fills their rice bowl. Harry Reid will be voted out of office in a few months; whether he was a racist will have nothing to do with that defeat, because being a douchebag far outweighs being a racist.

Because Harry's been a douchebag on a number of subjects for a number of years: the Healthcare debate, the one that's supposed to have been historically-transparent, takes place behind closed doors, where bribes, backroom deals, and political gifts are handed out like candy. And then promptly reported on the Nightly News; Harry can't even keep his graft secret in super-secret proceedings. Such stupidity and ineptitude in both public and private is astounding. He has no charisma, being just slightly less charming than Scrub Pox. He's no intellectual heavyweight, and is the perfect dipstick for measuring the depth of the surface. He and Nancy Pelosi will probably go down in history as two of the dumbest people to ever achieve such a high office, and their sheer idiocy will be studied for decades to come, and hopefully result in some sort of gene therapy for liberalism, or be used to prevent retardation in the womb.

Harry Reid will have done far more for the greater society in that capacity than he ever did as a Senator.

Harry Reid... you're a douchebag!

Remember: The DOW Award is given out weekly to the truly deserving in all fields of endeavor. If you wish to nominate someone for the DOW Award, simply send a mail to the address listed on the banner page, and include a link to any article or website that validates or proves your nominee's fresh, douche-y goodness!

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