Monday, March 07, 2011

The OTHER Emperor Without Clothes...

Mike Bloomberg is a lying douche who should never, ever be allowed anywhere near a Presidential primary.

(Ed. Note: The full version of this original article is now available online at Commentary Magazine).

For those of us who have suffered through the Reign of Doomberg the First, the evidence for the complete and utter failure which is the Bloomberg Administration is glaring and obvious, and given the current state of national politics in general, and New York politics in particular, it was entirely foreseeable.

Bloomberg the Politician has benefited from the paucity of qualified, or even likable, opponents from either the Left or Right; your choice as a voter in three successive New York Mayoral elections has been between Bad and Worse. Between Giant Douche and Turd Sandwich, to steal a meme from South Park.

Mike Bloomberg ran for mayor on the premise that a successful businessman was the best possible candidate to administrate the fifth or sixth (I forget which) largest government in America. That a man who had built a multi-billion dollar personal empire was possessed of the financial acumen and good judgement that would have seen New York prosper, with lower taxes, sensible laws, and steady stewardship. He is the example that has largely proven that while successful businessmen know how to make money in the private sector, they often haven't got the same sense bequeathed to a brain-damaged Irish Setter when it comes to managing an entity (a city workforce) who's vested interest is not in the profit of the entire enterprise, but in the maintenance of the status quo, and thus, their own profit.

The Mayor of the Best City on Planet Earth has spent his interminable term destroying the city, instead of building it up. It has been an almost-uninterrupted campaign of turning Manhattan into a liberal's paradise, where there's no smoking, no hotdogs, no automobiles, and the streets are returned to their 'rightful owners'; the big-money solons of the Upper East Side who don't wish to mix with the largely Working- and Recipient-class hoi polloi of the Outer Boroughs...unless the masses happen to be the hired help.

The man who sued Rudy Guiliani in order to get control of the rebuilding of New York after 9/11 has largely failed to do what he once promised to do. We're just now getting started on building, in earnest, the future monstrosity that will be known as the"Freedom Tower", while the Islamic assholes who destroyed the World Trade Center have been building victory monuments (Ground Zero Mosque) with largely federal funding and a phalanx of stupid politicians and judges to defend and advance their cause -- including Bloomberg. Bloomberg vowed to take charge of the reconstruction efforts, and then turned them over to people and entities even less-equipped than he was; three governors who couldn't find their own ass with both hands and a flashlight (Pataki, Spitzer, Paterson) and the Port Authority of New York-New Jersey, which has spent the last 25 years dragging New Jersey into the 20th century (i.e. the last one) at the expense of New York.

The man who promised to fix the Public Schools so that they turned out fairly-literate charges who could enter the workforce, has instead spent more money on education than many small nations for questionable results. He then contrived to have the poor results spun as a victory over ignorance, and he stands at the head of a school system that is flush with cash and unneeded teachers, but in which PTA's work like sled dogs to raise private funds to ensure those floating-on-a -sea-of-greenbacks schools have the basics: books, cleaning supplies and toilet paper (my sister, involved with the PTA in her local public school for the last decade, spends at least four months a year organizing fairs, raffles, and other events, and then begging local businesses for cash donations, to support the Public School that her children attend).

When Bloomberg decided to run for a third term, and couldn't because state and city law forbade a third term, he simply had the law changed to suit his needs. The largely democratic party-controlled City Council went along with him, because none of that rogues gallery of dim bulbs wanted to run for Mayor of a city ravaged by recession. The will of the voters, who had enacted that term limits law, was overturned largely by the whim and money of Mike Bloomberg...who now says that maybe the law should have remained in place, after he barely scratched out a $100-million victory over brainless clod who's only message was"Vote for me...I'm black and a democrat."

Bloomberg's rationale for a third term? "I'm the only one who can help New York recover from the financial distress it's in." And then he went and borrowed so much money to fund his pet-peeve-projects you would have thought that no one here paid any taxes, whatsoever (bicycle lanes that largely go unused, government campaigns against excess salt or sugar in the diet, enforcing smoking bans, forcing restaurants to reduce transfats in their menus, giving out free needles to heroin addicts to prevent the spread of AIDS -- the increase in both heroin use and AIDS cases just must have been one of them 'unforeseen consequences' of such enlightened policy -- and buying off every group or individual which might have uttered an unkind word about Emperor Mike with city 'financial aid', or as he likes to call it, 'patronage').

With that record of failure behind him, I can't figure out how it is that the man has the audacity to roll out of bed every morning and pretend he's a player on the national stage. That he actually has the arrogance to believe he's cut out for an even higher office. He has done the impossible and made much of David Dinkins' confused and scattershot Mayoral policy seem rational -- and cheaper --by comparison. If I had to guess, the entire purpose of the Bloomberg Administration has been to advance the personal cause of Mike Bloomberg, because as a citizen of this fair city, I sure as shit can't see how he's made life here any fucking better.

If Mike Bloomberg -- Emperor of New Yorkistan -- ever sees hisname on a presidential ticket in his lifetime, this country would be in dangerof electing an administration that would equal, and perhaps even exceed, Jimmy Carter's for sheer stupidity, arrogance, lack of direction, and ability to spend taxpayer money on largely fruitless-and-unnecessary nonsense -- the origin of which is not rooted in the public need, but rather in the Chief Executive's personal whims and flights of fancy.

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