Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Recovery Summer?

I really hate to rain on anyone's parade (well...not really. I actually enjoy pissing on other people's parades, just to see them freak), but this "Recovery Summer Tour 2010" nonsense is a load of unadulterated bovine scatological matter.

You can tell because, well...they sent Joe Biden out to bang the drum for it, and he winds up telling the truth in that Biden-esque way that could be the basis of a hit sitcom on NBC. We're somehow supposed to believe the Enlightened Economic Policies of Barack Obama (you know, the ones the Euros just pissed all over at the 'G20 Summit'?) are about to unleash a cornucopia of unrivalled economic prosperity on the American People; the train's a-comin'. We can see the headlight. We can hear the rattle of the tracks. Just you wait. Any day now. Any day now...

So, here's Joe telling us that the Obamatards "saved the banking system" and"stabilized the economy" with a Stimulus Bill in which 96% of the funds allocated (borrowed) haven't been spent, and the Nationalization-in-all-but-name of the biggest banks, insurance firms, and auto manufacturers, and happened.

It always happens with Joe. There are four things you can count on in life; death, taxes, Charles Schumer eventually killing a family of four in his mad rush to nasally drone in front of a television camera, and the premise that, if you follow Joe Biden around long enough with any sort of recording device, you will, eventually, get the whole truth despite Joe's best efforts to continue The Lie. In fact, follow him around long enough and you'll get a litany of truths.

The first truth was contained in the words"...those jobs are never coming back", in reference to the 8 million jobs lost since the beginning of this financial crisis. This was an administration that said it would have to have a $787 billion "stimulus" (which has been mostly geared, thus far, towards fattening the bank accounts of narrow democratic party constituencies ahead of the 2010 and 2012 elections) if it was "to keep unemployment at 8%". Well, it got that "Stimulus" (the first bill that no one read, or was that TARP? It's all become a blur)...

...And the Unemployment rate is closer to 10%, (closer to 17% real unemployment) and the Obamatards are comfortable with the fact that many of them are gone forever, while maintaining the fantasy that there's another batch of jobs just around the corner. You just have to believe in that Hopenchangin' magic, and poof! a Green job, or temporary Census Worker will just drop into your lap. Just you wait and see!

Well, there ain't no 8 million "Green Jobs" coming because Green Energy is a load of bullshit. Like the Loch Ness Monster, Bigfoot, The Flying Dutchman, and the Perpetual Motion Machine, the Green Energy Economy is largely a myth. More conventional industries are now under assault, or in the government's crosshairs; Big Oil garnered the wrong sort of attention when BP poisoned the Gulf of Mexico. Wall Street is about to be slapped with a new round of regulations-which-are-really-taxes that will probably hasten the destruction of many of the weaker-but-salvageable firms. Obamacare (the second bill that no one read) will nationalize, unionize and cost-control the medical profession back into the Middle Ages of bloodletting and leaches.

All of those industries are about to get socked to pay for penile implants for illegal immigrants, paying the UAW to continue voting democrat, saving a variety of obscure wildlife that stands in the way of progress and prosperity, and funding every stupid-ass-pie-in-the-sky-hippie-program that can spring from the fevered imaginations of Obama, Pelosi and Reid, unless they are either stripped of power, or assassinated (and no, that was NOT a request, just hyperbole. If you're thinking about killing anyone, please make it someone truly Lady Gaga or Simon Cowell).

The second truth was revealed, in of all places, a custard shop in Wisconsin.

Joe stopped in for a tasty frozen treat, and got into a bit of banter with the shop manager, who decided that the opportunity to make a political statement while Joe was trying to make his own (after all, the Vice President rubbing elbows with the Peasants in front of cameras is supposed to be all about the Administration, not the People. Showing him up is considerd Bad Form, you know). When asked "How much do I owe you?" for the frozen treats, the manager intimated that if perhaps the Vice President could convince the Administration to lower taxes, the bill would be paid in full, Joe went into full menstrual fury mode.

As far as snits are concerned, this was a good one. Joe reminded me of an old girlfriend who always acquired the most disturbing personality traits whenever she was menstruating. There was the constipated visage; that intense look that could curdle milk, and perhaps separate oil and water, if it didn't set the oil aflame first. Then came the tightening, like a rope being wound around a windlass, complete with that Noise -- the one that sounds like straining and cracking wood that is produced as fingers are balled into a fist and the knuckles strain the flesh of the hand. Finally, there was the eye-rolling-looking-down-my-nose-at-you-contempt, the utter disdain for all living things, especially those who had decided that RIGHT FUCKING NOW was a good time to challenge a coiled rattlesnake. Yep, Joe looked exactly like Denise whenever Aunt Flo came to visit.

"Why do you have to be a wise-ass?" asked the Vice President. Or words to that effect. And therein was the nugget of truth; Joe Biden doesn't have to take guff and back-talk from the Peasants. How dare one of these people question the authority and actions of their Betters? How is it that such a lower life form can imagine that he knows more about economic and taxation matters than a President who spent nearly a whole year in the Senate? It is not Our (meaning we peasants) job to question, suggest, or to even remind Joe that he actually works for us, and that criticism comes with the job. No, Our job is to meekly knuckle under, and follow the dictates of a class of snobs which does everything ass-backwards, and turns everything it touches into a pile of gold-plated turds -- when it does anything at all -- and to shut up about it.

Take your ass rape like a man, Custard Shop Manager! Get with the program.

With apologies to the late General Stillwell, "Vinegar and Water" Joe (Biden) gave you all the proof you ever needed that we are being"led" (mostly astray) by a group of complete retards with extremely thin skin, and no tolerance for debate. They call themselves "liberals", but there's very little of the liberal about them. And they show it everytime you try to question their authority and actions: they run you out of Town Hall meetings (notice there don't seem to be any of those, anymore?), they criticize you for being a plodding clod if you watch or read anything they don't approve of, they call you a Nazi if you decide to join a Tea Party or hold a view that runs contrary to their requirements, and then they call you a wise-ass if you manage to get a bit of your own back at their expense.

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