"Journalists" are Assholes...

The novel is coming along. If by 'coming along' I mean to say that writing it is like pulling teeth. I hadn't realized that it would have been this difficult to tell a story you've rehearsed inside your own head for nearly a decade, but apparently it is.

I was recently complaining about this to a journalist friend of mine (he writes for one of the New York dailies, but not one of the Big Three) who said something along the lines of "Now you know what we journalists have to contend with...".

Two things:

Fuck Big Bird...

The last time I looked, Big Bird was something on the order of a billion-dollar-a-year business.

Which brings us to the question:

"If Sesame Street is so successful, why does it require -- or at least the television network it appears on require -- a taxpayer-paid infusion of cash every goddamned year?"

And that's in addition to the proceeds from a concentrated program of organized, professional begging (hey, hope you enjoy that $1,000 plastic tote bag, and the Liza Minelli CD's!!) that according to PBS. itself, brings in almost as much as the federal subsidy (somewhere in the neighborhood of $400-500 million bucks).

So, let's do some basic math:

Romney is Right...

In a transparent effort to drum up a controversy where none exists, and doing so in such a childish and petty way that it almost makes you pine for the days when REAL Libtard journalists, like Cronkite, Jennings, Moyers, Arnett, and Rather, knew how to lie at least half-assedly convincingly in defense of a complete loser asshole of a President who had a drunk chick's chance in a redneck bowling alley on two-for-one Coor's Lite night of pulling out a squeaker victory come Election Day.

Romney Gaffes! Screams one headline. Romney accidentally tells truth and admits to being a miserably rich bastard who hates poor people and puppies! furiously spins yet another third-grade-reading level-use-a lot- of-short words-so-the-college-kids-can-understand-you denizen of his mother's basement. Romney in Trouble! assures your local fishwrap, whose circulation is dropping faster than a Chicago schoolkid's chances of achieving basic literacy.

The Fifteen Biggest Bullshitters In America Today...

I believe it was the late George Carlin who once said, paraphrasing, that the biggest industry in America was the production, packaging, marketing and distribution of Bullshit.

Sometimes, when you look at the blasted heath that was once the landscape of this Great Nation, and you think about how it all devolved to deposit us at our current state of affairs, it's difficult not to agree with that cynical sentiment. You need look no further than the corridors of power in America for proof of this maxim:

President Obama is a bullshit artist.

Most members of Congress are bullshit artists.

Local governments are overflowing with bullshit artists, from the execrable personage of Mayor Michael Bloomdouche...errr...Bloomberg...of my great city of New York, to the "Honorable" Jerry Brown, governor of a bankrupt California which is rapidly becoming Mexico, only with indoor plumbing and food.

About Richard Nixon...

I read this today, a defense of Richard Milhous Nixon, a.k.a. Tricky Dick of Watergate Fame.

It was written by Conrad Black, who himself knows a thing or two about being railroaded by his enemies, especially the political kind.

I found this article interesting because Black uses the phrase "criminalization of policy and partisan differences", and means that to say that both ends of the political spectrum routinely accuse the other of being the absolute worst people born since Hitler and Genghis Khan had identical triplets. According to this sort of mindset, anything the other side has to say on any subject is reflexively responded to by it's counterpart as the grossest crime, or the most egregious abuse of human rights, and probably an indication that one side or the other would like to run a conveyor belt full of kittens through industrial wood chippers and sell the resulting mess as luncheon meat in your kid's school cafeteria.

No one gets the benefit of the doubt, anymore, no serious question ever gets the fair hearing it deserves.

Okay, Mitt Romney...Now What?

Imagine that you are Mitt Romney; you've just garnered enough delegates to win the GOP presidential primary, and have all but sewn up the nomination. You're about to go on the attack against The Anti-Christ...errr...President Obama. You're confident. You're in command of the facts and figures. You have found a message that resonates with at least two-thirds of republican primary voters and a mess of independents. You believe that you possess the skills necessary to transform your Vision of These Here United States into a workable program that the majority of Americans will understand, and then turn that vision into a reality.

Before you hit the ground running, Mr. Romney -- which, incidentally, is the time where most candidates stumble -- you'll need to keep a few things in perspective, and you'll have to deal with a few more issues in a more forthright manner than you have to date (although, i must admit, hitting the Obamatard on economics in front of a boarded-up Solyndra was a stroke of marketing genius).

So, unbidden, and with full confidence that no one who matters is going to listen to a thing I have to say, I would like to offer you some advice on seven subjects that I believe will be front-and-center in this election. If you follow my advice, Mr. Romney, I'm certain that not only will you coast to election, but you'll also force Modern Progressive Liberalism (three lies for the price of one) into a lengthy, decades-long retreat.

Ignore my advice at your peril!

Something To Keep Y'All Busy...

I will be quite busy for the next few days, and shall not be stopping in to blog. I know...it's sad, ain't it? There's a few familial obligations to attend to this weekend, and a whole lot of 'networking' to be done at a few so-called Job Fairs, which are more like cattle calls for gray-haired, middle-aged male PhD's and MBA's who are apparently so desperate for a job that they'll sink to selling Green Energy door-to-door.

Been there, and done that. Oh, and of the two so-called Job Fairs or Job Seminars that I've been to in the past two weeks, they're all selling the same type of job;

You work on a "commission-based system"  (that is, for free) for a company that is a fly-by-night subsidiary of a Fortune 1000 that doesn't want to hire you because you cost too much -- what with Social Security taxes, unemployment insurance and fucking ObamaCare. Hopefully, you manage to sell whatever bullshit product they're pushing -- it's such a good product that the company doesn't dare send out it's professional, full-time-pay salesmen to do it for fear of taking them away from the actual lucrative products they normally sell -- to at least recoup your bus fare this week while you're "getting the hang of the sales' thing", and in the meantime, the "company" is either sold without a word, the government-financing runs out, or it goes into bankruptcy, always unexpectedly.

No wonder 30 million people have given up looking for a job.


Anyways, to help keep you entertained for at least a few minutes, I've collected some bits of news and some links for you.to look over. This is all stuff I normally would have blogged about, but for the time constraints and the busy past week, and soon-to-be busier week to come. Enjoy!

Jammie Wearing Fool has moved. Like an idiot, I did not know this. I used to visit JWF just about every day, but then forgot they existed. Which was a big mistake! Visit them today, and have a look-see, or else something seriously bad might happen to your pet Yorkie in the dead of night. Blogroll, belatedly, updated.

Also, it's good to see that Greasywrench has returned to blogging after a long hiatus. You should visit his site, too, if only because you never can quite tell who it was that accidentally-on-purpose cut your brake lines because you didn't. Grease was once an avid supporter of this diseased rant, and this is where I get to pay him off. Go visit.

It goes without saying that if you're STILL not reading Iowahawk regularly then you deserve a big, sloppy tongue kiss from Nancy Pelosi...post her garlic chicken and fried onion luncheon, and only then, after she's licked her own balls as only your dog can.This week's fare is a rib-ticklin' funny-but-sadly-all-too-true Masterpiece of sarcasm and satire.


The American Spectator goes to the Heart of the Sickness Within the Obama Administration. A must-read for those of you who still haven't grapsed the amateurish depravity, or detected the simple-minded, mile-wide Leftoid Fucktard streak in President Odoofus that causes him to go all gay and shit.

John Derbyshire tells the truth about The Establishment Right (and you know who you are, Rich Lowry, and the rest of the frat-boy wing of the conservative movement!). I did not know Derb was ill, and wish him well. I am a big fan from his days at National Review. Between the trust-fund-prep-school Right and the Godbots, this GOP of ours is gonna be royally screwed up one day.

We finish things off, appropriately enough, with a double dose of Professor Hanson. First on just why California is royally screwed if Obama remains in power (as if that wasn't obvious enough?), and then with a classic explanation of why Barack Obama will lose the rhetorical war -- and the election -- to Mitt Romney.

I know there's more that has happened this week, but I'm kinda swamped. Promise that next week I'll get on some things (like the Obama Administration airbrushing the biographies of other Presidents to make their man look like he has clue-fucking-one), and I'll have something to say about snoring...yes, you read that right: Snoring.

See you next week.

UPDATE: Apologies, but on the John Derbyshire thing: you need to read a few of his columns back (and read this here column that started the whole thing) to get the entire gist of it. Derb apparently was denounced by his former "friends" at National Review for...gasp!...speaking his mind on matters of race. Which lead one reader to wonder (paraphrased) "Why do the people at National Review even bother to grovel on questions of race when they will only be called racists, anyway?"

An Argument Against Drug Legalization...

The New Republic: Obama Campaign Has "Momentum".

Now you know why the Left-wing Press (sorry, that's redundant) is so eager to be Obama's lapdog: they're all stoned, crazy, stupid, or all three.

From The "Don't Be Ridiculous Files"...

Short Answer: NO.

Some thoughts on Michelle Obama.

If This Is What Real Life Looks Like…

...then we're all screwed, blued, and tattooed.

I am a voracious consumer of television. I don’t know specifically when this bad habit started, I only know that television is a part of about half my normal day. I watch the news religiously (thank that non-existent deity for Fox) and The History Channel, and most sporting events (hockey and football) are about as close to a religious experience as I can manage.

My television viewing habits used to be quite selective, but this has changed since I have taken up residence with my new/old girlfriend. Her viewing habits are, shall we say, not quite as discerning as mine. This fact has led me to a whole slew of new viewing experiences that, quite frankly, cause me to fear for the future of the human species.

Halperin: Dick Leaves a Bad Taste in His Mouth...

So, Time Magazine's (that's still in business?) Mark Halperin called President Obama a 'dick' on Morning Joe?


What's so completely shocking about this is not that (P)MSNBC allowed such a visceral criticism of It's Messiah to hit the airwaves, but that Mika Bra-bra-bra-shin-ski should go through the giggling schoolgirl routine when she heard the word. You're not fooling anyone, Mika: we know that you're intimately familiar with that word.


How do you think she got that job in the first place?

I don’t know what all the brouhaha is about: Halperin’s criticism -- even his use of a slang term for a penis -- was extraordinarily mild when you stop to consider just what a disaster Barack Obama is/was/has become.

The Reality of Obama is not what The Promise of Obama, well... promised. It never could be. But that was painfully obvious – to everyone, except maybe Libtards – way back in 2008. Had the Press, which was busily cheering Obama on, and in fact made Obama into a Messianic figure, had instead been doing it’s primary job – discovering who the man was, and what he was all about, instead of being mystified by soaring speeches and an unusual racial bio – they would not be quite as disappointed today as they so obviously are.

Then again, part of being a Libtard is always about being disappointed. That’s bound to happen when you dream of impossible things, and live in a fantasy world where other people’s money buys everything, and Human Nature is something that can be routinely ignored. Liberals engage in what a psychiatrist might call ‘A Self-Defeating-Self-Fulfilling Prophecy’ loop in all things. If they were all put on the couch, every last one of them would emerge as a prime candidate for heavy doses of Prozac.

This is in large part because Modern Liberalism is primarily about emotions, and not about facts, logic or  the realistic evaluation of possibilities. People who react emotionally to everything, people who make great leaps of faith and jump to conclusions without thinking, usually find themselves sorely disappointed.


And in denial about the part they’ve played in their own failure.


The Left in this country is bitter, negative, unhelpful, combative, spiteful, delusional, misguided, deluded, retarded, and permanently adolescent. And it doesn’t matter who is power; they would have been just as disappointed, no matterwho had won the election of 2008, and we’d probably even be hearing many of the same complaints from the Left about a Hillary Clinton presidency, because she at least has the minimum of braincells required to make compromises, and the ambition to do whatever it takes to be seen as successful, and that often means giving a big middle finger to the Left for selfish, personal ends. Especially when those ends might clash with boilerplate Libtardism.


The difference in this case is that the Press had an emotional stake in the election and success of Barack Obama, and it never occurred to them that he just might not be up to the job. The greatest indication that Barry isn’t up to the task is all the time he spends not doing it; the multiple vacations, the golf outings, the jetting off to fundraisers, the set-piece kabuki plays of political speeches in front of rabid supporters (some of whom, it’s been rumored, have been paid to cheer, and even faint, on cue). He's never at the scene of an oil spill, flood, or tornado, and he seems to leave the job of actually governing to Joe Biden and Congress.


If Mark Halperin is disappointed in B.O. because Gitmo is still open, because there’s no Single-Payer system in place, because instead of two unpopular wars we now have three (and possibly four), because Republicans and Tea Party people haven’t been frog-marched to the Concentration Camps, because homosexuals still don’t have the right to have buck-naked swordfights in the public square, or because there hasn’t been a federal investigation of Sarah Palin’s womb yet, then he has only himself to blame.


He promoted and then probably voted for this dick.


And George W. Bush’s name had become by November of 2008, ‘Mud’.


The Press did that, too, and Halperin was in the vanguard then.


By comparison, George W. Bush now looks like a reasonable man, a veritable Bismark/Disraeli/Churchill/Reagan all rolled up into one, even if the truth of his Presidency was far from it. The Press, led by people like Halperin, who did such a bad job of covering the Bush Administration (likely because they were far too busy making fun of Bush’s cowboy accent and portraying him as a drooling idiot) was entirely AWOL on the subject of covering Barack Obama the Candidate, and has done nothing but cover for him since. And now they’re tired of it.


I do have to say one thing in Halperin’s defense: you would never have heard the word ‘Dick’ applied to Obama’s predecessors by a member of the media in the past, and while the Lefty press certainly was thinking ‘Dick’ about Reagan, Bush I and II, they at least never crossed that line of disrespect. It’s telling that the man they built up and supported, the man they’ve been lying about for the last five years, the man that The Press has such a vested interest in, is now openly mocked and disrespected in such visceral terms.


Perhaps for the first time in his career, Halperin is telling the truth.


You could only imagine what other adjectives, and body parts, Halperin would have mentioned had Barack Obama been a Republican.

Weiner's Weiner...

I almost threw up in my own mouth when I read this.

Rep. Anthony Weiner is both an insufferable twat and the most-aptly named man in Washington. He behaves in a manner that makes you want to stick an icepick through his eyeballs. Twice. Assuming that no one on Planet Earth could ever find a reasonable, defensible, logical or provable defense FOR anti-Semitism, Anthony Weiner could give them one just by opening his piehole (not that we advocate such a thing here at The Asylum. If you feel the undeniable need to hate someone, then please direct your hatreds at someone who might actually deserve it...like a Muslim.)

I've said before on these pages: New York State has the worst, dumbest, and most embarrassing Congressional delegation in American history.

This is how you know your elected officials are incapable of running a country: we live in an Information Age, where communications are instantaneous, and the ability to transmit and diffuse information at -- almost literally - at light speed is a fact of life. We live in an age of a 24-hour news cycle, with thousands of outlets constantly searching for any bit of anything that is even of the slightest interest, hungry for even more channels of input, and ways to devour more airtime at a profit. We live in an age where everyone and his dog has a video camera, recording device, cell phone, computer, and access to thousands, if not millions, of databases where they can record, store, examine and retrieve almost every fact of your life -- every utterance, every (you think) secret, every correspondence --from the most inconsequential to the greatest of All-Time-Biggest-Bonehead moves.

They should know these things are becoming the New Normal in our diseased modern culture, and that you cannot escape these traps...and yet our ruling class still does it, anyway.

John Edwards is quite possibly going to jail because he couldn't keep his pants zipped up, or a camera out of his bedroom, and it's only by the grace of whatever you hold holy that there was no such thing as Facebook or Twitter around for him to dig his hole any deeper.

And let's face it: someone is always out to get you -- your business or political rivals, your insurance company, anyone who wants to sell you something, your bank. No one has any reasonable expectation of privacy anymore, for the simple fact that everything is recorded, somewhere, and also because these new media often encourage people to volunteer in destroying their own personal privacy by allowing them to share the innermost secrets of their lives with others.

And somehow, these people -- your Ruling Class --  don't know this. Or worse, they know it, and just don't give a shit.

You would think that someone who's claim to rule over us peasants was based upon the presumptions of superior intelligence and integrity would be extremely circumspect about what he/she does on the Internet. But I guess not.

If this turns out to be true, and Rep. Weiner's Facebook account hasn't been hacked, then you have to wonder about his ability and worthiness to continue in office. In the grand scheme of things, sending a picture of your dong -- suitably covered -- to someone is probably not a hanging offense, but you have to know: given the ability of the Internet to keep people anonymous and diffuse that which one wishes to remain confidential, what would have happened if the recipient of this picture happened to be, say, a 14-yr old girl pretending to be someone she wasn't?

What if she did happen to be a 14 year old girl, and Weiner knew it? Sheesh! That's a whole 'nuther can o' worms, my friends! Doesn't anyone watch To Catch a Predator, anymore?

Unfortunately, I believe that Congressman Weiner will survive this little dustup, if only because New York City democrats (small 'd' intentional) have the mental capacity of dryer lint, and because politics in this city isn't based upon questions of Right and Wrong, or "What's good for the Country?" but upon "how much money can you steal for me, today?" and if Weiner has been even halfway decent in this regard with his constituents (i.e. partners in crime) then his minions will defend him with their very lives. Because he's a clueless and insufferable asshole, he'll just pretend as if nothing has happened and become twice the annoying and destructive dickhead that he was before.

As terrible as this sounds, I certainly DO hope this ended up in some 14-year old's mailbox, so that we could have a crime with which to charge this douchebag.

Then he can show his pecker to a whole new bunch of friends.

Poetic Justice?

French Commie Rapist (sorry, that's redundant) may have contracted AIDS from his victim.

I was really hoping to not have to post anything on this case because, well, Dominique Strauss-Khan is a fucking Frog and everyone knows that Frogs are opportunistic little douchebags with a penchant for disgusting and deviant behavior, all the while brandishing the club of their 'superior' culture that hasn't achieved a damned thing that one could proudly brag about (except for maybe a burqa ban, and the invention of the pre-printed surrender form addressed 'To Whom it May Concern...") for the last 100 years.

It's hardly worth the effort to refer to the French at all.

I hope he does get AIDS. I hope he gets full-blown, monkeys-flying-out-of-his-ass, radioactive, scabs-on-top-of-other-scabs, dripping-like-a-Good-Humor-Bar-in-August, excructiating-pains-and-constant-simultaneous-vomiting-and-explosive-diarrhea-type AIDS, and that it progresses at light-speed so that it's terminal phase begins while he's still in a cell at Rikers. I hope they let him loose to be ass-raped by all the other criminals in there, so that they'll all die exceptionally quickly and horribly -- which is what criminals should do -- and save us hundreds of millions of dollars because we won't have to house, feed, or provide medical care and legal services to these parasites.

The courts would suddenly become unclogged.

The Parole Boards would suddenly have nothing to do.

Half the psychiatrists in the state would be immediately unemployed, and have to flip burgers for a living.

The crime rate would plummet as people were given a graphic example of just why you don't want to go to prison -- so fucking behave yourself.

Prisons would shut down for lack of inmates.

I understand the titllation factor involved but let's get this straight: most European Men are half-rapists to begin with, it's just that European Women are so notoriously easy and fatalistic about the whole thing. What passes for rape in America is simply foreplay in France. Just ask Julian Assange. It's even worse in Italy.

Some will be shocked and dismayed by apparent lack of restraint. Ask me if I care.


Still, the whole thing gives you some small hope that there is some cosmic justice after all, doesn't it?

Eating Cake or Crow?

"Let them eat cake..." becomes "Go buy a new, fuel-efficient vehicle -- that you probably can't afford because of the difficulties in securing credit -- to replace the old, less-efficient vehicle that you can't afford because of your looming unemployment, rising taxes and artificially-inflated currency, all thanks to my Enlightened Economic Policies, you Peasant!"

Oh, and have fewer children, you Horndog! It's becoming clearer with each passing day what Barack the First wants Americans to do -- i.e. suffer in silence while he goes on vacation and makes plans to spend money that doesn't exist even in someone's dreams --and then thank him for it. Or at least have the good grace not to be a whiny bitch. After all, Barack Obama wasn't elected to fill your gas tank, Asshole; he was elected to ensure that the destructive elements of American society could be fully-funded before the money ran out.

That means that you, the Citizen, have to be stripped of your wealth, choices and freedoms, and have no right to question me on anything, and if you don't like it, too bad; I'm off to Hawaii -- again -- on your dime, Sucker, and there isn't anything you can do about it for another year, at least.

Obama had better get himself a food-taster, because every time he opens his mouth and puts his complete lack of economic acumen on display -- not to mention his total lack of empathy -- he's one step closer to getting himself killed (and no, we don't advocate that here at the Asylum), much like Louis XVI.

The Emperor hath spoken about higher gas prices.

Marie Antoinette, it must be noted, never said what she's been accused of. Instead, it's probably the invention of the pro-revolutionary media of the day, much like Obama's electoral victory in the Fall of 2008 was likewise mostly manufactured by today's pro-revolutionary media.

Unlike Marie Antoinette, though, Obama will not lose his head to a rampaging mob, and if he did, the only consequences would be yet another national holiday paying homage to another lackluster non-entity or long-out-of-fashion ideal added to the calendar, so maybe that's not such a bad idea, until you realize that would mean President Joe Biden.

Really, can you remember anyone in the same position being that out-of-touch with reality, or that arrogant with no record to be arrogant about? That dismissive of the concerns of the people he's supposed to be governing? That determined to do something 'great' in the eyes of History that it blinds him to the needs and circumstances of The Present, no matter how many it kills?

Nero? Mussolini? Napoleon? Your guess is as good as mine. How about we make a competition out of it?

Send me your suggestions for the most Out-of-touch, Arrogant and Pig-Headed 'Leaders' in World History. The Winner -- the person who chooses the Historical Figure which most accurately portrays Emperor Barry I --  will get an all-expenses-paid trip to his/her local Applebee's or TGIF -- so long as those expenses don't include actually paying for the meal  -- in other words, you're getting bus fare, since Obama is making certain that you can't afford to both drive and eat in the same day.

Discuss!

Trump on Birth Certificates...

NBC used to be a monolith of journalism, the Gold Standard by which all other journalistic endeavors were measured. Now it is simply a collection of panty-bunched Leftards who have decided that the public needs to be protected from the truth, and which needs to cover it's own collective ass, since there was no greater Cheerleader for Barry Oh-Blah-Blah than NBC news. Even if that means dismissing out-of-hand that which so obviously blows their carefully-constructed narrative of the Greatness of The Won to smithereens.

What has NBC news in such a tizzy? Donald Trump wants to see Barack Obama's Birth Certificate, too.

I mean, even Mika Bra-bra-za-za-zinski has her titties in a knot over the whole thing, and while I used to like her, I'm now convinced after watching Morning Joe fairly religiously for the last few months that she has the sort of intellectual acuity one usually associates with a grapefruit. Her father may have once been Secretary of State (to Jimmy Carter, which makes that sort of like being the chief clown in the circus), but I'm beginning to wonder just who she had to blow to get that gig.

The whole Birther Controversy will soon blow over, in any case; Resident Odoofus won't be occupying the White House after January 20, 2013, and then I'm fairly certain the fur-breasted, bitter gun-clingers will finally get their answer to the questions that consume their every waking thought: is Obama a citizen of the United States? Is he a closet Muslim? Was his election truly valid?

I would tend to believe there are more important questions to be asked right now: like who we'll eventually choose to replace President Unmitigated-Disaster...and her husband, or How do we repair the American economy? When do we finally achieve energy independence? How many Congresscritters can we shoot (rhetorically) in the Public Square when it's all over?

Once Obama is gone, the Press, especially NBC News, will no longer have a vested interest in propping him up, and then the real investigative reporting that should have been done before they ushered Obama into office will finally be done, when he's no longer of any use to them. Having constructed the Potemkin President and presented him to the world as Savior of the Universe, the assholes at NBC, (P)MSNBC, CNN, CBS and the New York Times will recklessly proceed with indecent haste to finally tell the truth, the whole truth and nuthin' but the truth, vis-a-vis President Marriott-Suites.

If only to save whatever journalistic reputation and pretense to objectivity they might be able to salvage.

Only then will History be able to judge whether Barry from Hawaii was ever eligible, or qualified, to be President of these United States, and then the lessons learned will be carried forward. I wouldn't doubt if in the near future we start subjecting our candidates to such intense scrutiny that they will have to undergo a colonoscopy in order to allay any public speculation that Jimmy Hoffa may be buried in one of their intestines.

The real point of the whole Birther thing in the first place was to find a reason, any reason conceivable or plausible, to keep Obama from taking the Oath of Office, or failing that, of bringing him down, eventually. Unfortunately for the Birthers, Barack Obama requires absolutely no help from them in order to fuck things up royally. Of course, Birthers fail to realize that if they ever did get Obama on this birth certificate thing, it would only lead to the even sadder consequence of leaving the country in even less-capable hands: Joe Biden's.

With Hillary Clinton waiting in the wings -- cleaning her guns.

The Birthers would risk even that; they're so impatient to bring about the Rapture (or whatever the fuck it is they want) that they can't wait for 2013. To them, every second that Barry Oantichrist sits in the Oval Office brings this nation one second closer to complete and utter, cosmic, doom.

Dudes..Chill out. We already passed the "Apocalypse, Next Right" sign when Bill Clinton stood before a national audience and proudly, even brazenly, lied through his teeth.

"I didn't inhale..." He said. And everyone knew he was full of shit, but they still voted for him. Twice.

If you hadn't recognized then that the American Public was content to be lied to in the most audacious and bald-faced manner, and even seem to not only NOT give a shit, but in fact reward the liar who insulted their intelligence with a second term, then you missed your Apocalyptic Tipping Point.

Barack Obama is the man who will destroy America? Fuck, that process started already. Obama just clocked in for the Night Shift. And truthfully, it's been CONGRESS which has done far more damage than Obama, Bush or Clinton. They just happen to be the guys in charge whenever the Perpetual Fisting of America enters it's next cycle. Barack Obama isn't the one who 'ruined' America: he just came along and poured salt and lemon juice in the open wounds.

You want to know who ruined America, then take at look at the people who usually escape the blame for the state of affairs they created: the professional political class, big business, lawyers, libtards, and a public so mind-bogglingly stupid that they made the choice the Press wanted them to make in the fall of 2008. The Press liked the story -- Black Man makes Good in Racist-est Country in Human History -- so who gives a shit if he's actually capable of doing the job?

By the end of next year, they'll have a whole new story to pitch to you: How Did this Douchebag Manage to Scam America into Voting for Him? The truth will eventually be told. Just keep your panties on.

I'm no fan of Barack Obama, believe me, but at this point trying to get him tossed from office on such skinny hopes reeks of the Prosecuting Attorney who went into court with a murder weapon, the suspect's fingerprints and DNA, three eyewitnesses, a confession and the whole crime captured on videotape, loses his case through incredible stupidity -- and then tries to get the accused busted on a jaywalking rap, just to save face.

Barack Obama's Birth Certificate just might turn out to be the political equivalent of The Bloody Glove.

They way I figure it, the Press will be insanely interested in finding out for you, but only after the man they've built up has finally begun his downward spiral. It's how Leftards play politics: they not only bury their dead, they rush to be the first to bury their wounded, too. In the meantime, it's not as if Barack Obama is actually in the White House, what with all the vacations, golf outings, campaign stops, set speechifying in front of hand-picked crowds with three teleprompters in tow, so why not just let the issue lie for now?

I mean, imagine how much worse it could be if he were actually trying?

The only good thing about this brouhaha is that Next Time We'll Ask. All political candidates will probably be posting their Birth Certificates on billboards from here on in.

As for the possibility of Donald Trump being a contender for President of the United States: do you honestly imagine he could do worse than any of the Professional Politicians we're likely to see run, given the recent track records and current rosters of either political party?

Foreign WMD's Found in America!

Maybe. There's a lot of hemming and hawing, and the word "maybe" is being thrown about an awful lot. Either the man is telling the truth, or the population is being subjected to a psychological exercise that will probably result in greater government control of everything from the production and distribution of toilet paper, to how many times and in what fashion, you may clench and unclench your sphincter when you hear the phrase "Weapon of Mass Destruction".

And since when did they become "Weapons of Mass Effect"? Is that part of the program wherein "Terrorism" became "Man-Caused Disaster"?

If this story is true, I wonder who the Obama Administration plans to sue in the event of a Man-Caused Disaster created by a Weapon of Mass Effect? Because that's pretty much all they're good for.

I'd also like to know (but I'm afraid I already know the answer to this question) why I have to read about shit like this in a British Newspaper, and not, say, the New York Times? Why doesn't Katie Couric lead with this on tonight's newscast? Where was the "in-depth" investigatory piece by Newsweek or Time?

Oh, right. Can't blame a conservative for it, and anything which might cast multiculturalism in a negative light is to be assiduously avoided. Like the Clap.

So-called journalists in this country wonder why it is that the network news and the daily newspaper are dying breeds? I can promise you this; after something went BOOM! in downtown Los Angeles or Chicago, those same "journalists" would be rushing to get crap to print or on the air in order to "inform" you, and the amount of information and the number of "experts" they would have lined up to fill you in on the why's and wherefore's would be astounding -- and indicative of just how much the Press knew before the event, but sat on for weeks and months so as to not embarrass President Marriot-Suites...and her husband, too...or withheld so as to not "give offense" to specific minority groups with a penchant for beheading and for kneeling to a black rock in an otherwise-empty desert.

Multiculturalism gets people killed. Political Correctness gets people killed. Pumped-up bubbleheads who who couldn't find their own asses with both hands and a flashlight making poorly-informed and personally-biased decisions about what is news, what is acceptable, what is politically expedient, what viewpoints are valid -- under the banner of Journalism -- are going to get people killed.

Full of Sound and Fury, Signifying Nothing...

A Congresswoman gets shot, and six people, including a nine-year old girl are killed, and what happens?

Rep. Peter King (Asshat - NY) proposes a law making it illegal to be within 1,000' of a public official while in possession of a gun. I suppose this means we'll have to go back to the Good Old Days, when the really chic assassin used a sniper rifle.

Senator Dick Durban (Dingleberry - Il) decries the martial characterizations and use of crosshairs in our political debate, which he believes incites violence against Members of Congress. Apparently, people need to be whipped up into a frenzy by images to hate Congress.

Soon, I'm certain that Rep. Anthony Weiner (Jerkoff - NY) will chime in with his usual feeble offering of broad platitudes, useless metaphors, and ritual denouncement of people smarter than he is (i.e. just about everyone).

Eventually, Super-Assistant-Deputy-Sidekick-Gopher-Under-Secretary-to-the-Plenipotentiary-For-Asinine Remarks, Harry Balszac (D- Greenwich Village), a minor Obama Administration sub-functionary, will speak his peace (To DailyKos, off course) about how none of this would have happened if only Sarah Palin had just aborted her Down's Syndrome Child.

Not to be left out, Rep. Constance J. Pinke-Snapper (D-Vagina...errr...Virginia) will make the argument that being ruled by men with names that are euphemisms for the Penis (Peter, Dick, Weiner) is a proof-positive of the Gender Inequality in America's Government, that requires full federal funding for Abortions to amend.

In a way, it's almost fitting that America in the year 2011 should have overlords who's names all seem Phallocentric, and attached to men who don't know their asses from their elbows, but know how togive us all the Purple Shaft. It's also fitting that such sub-standard intellects should act and speak in blind panic when the usual bullshit that is their stock-in-trade just won't fly.

All of this nonsense was uttered in reaction to the Giffords Shooting, and all of it was, dierectly or no, encouraged by a media even dumber than the people they cover. A few observations on this entire fiasco, if I may, and then I'm not touching the subject ever again, if I can help it;

The Liberal Media, and the Congressional Douchebags who feed them, all warned us not to jump to conclusions about the identities and motives of the Fort Hood Shooter, The D.C. Snipers, The Times Square Bomber, The Underwear Bomber and others, but were themselves very quick to jump to their own conclusions here. I'm not going to rehash all of that nonsense about the use of Military Terminology and Hate Speech in our political discourse and all the rest, because it's been disseminated and rehashed everywhere by now. Besides, it's a stupid argument, and it's also a false one, because that's how libtards behave -- they try to make every argument about stupid things, and then lie about it.

Suffice to say, what we've seen in the wake of this tragedy was the democratic party's, and the left-wing's in general, deepest-held beliefs and most fervent wishes seemingly made real: they believe, with every fibre of their beings, that republicans (small 'r' intentional), conservatives (small 'c' intentional) and Tea Partiers are all potential time bombs of hatred and intolerance, just waiting for the right moment to engage in a systematic spree of assassinations, hate crimes, immigrant bashing, rape, and Anti-Semitism. They seriously wanted, no needed, Jared Loughner to be a member of the John Birch Society, have a picture of George Bush in his wallet, and to have to pray at a Sarah Palin shrine in his bedroom, because if that were so, they'd have been handed the opportunity to "take the higher moral ground" in just about any political debate.

And if they had to invent those connections from thin air, so be it. There's no rules in this game, so far as they're concerned.

Because to a leftie, everything in life becomes political and the mere appearance of the moral -- should there be a moral dimension -- is, well, that's just a fortuitous coincidence.

They have to behave this way. They have to be opportunists and sophists because they serve no useful function. They must paint their enemies, real and perceived, as the worst sorts of human beings because if the true nature of their own intentions and activities were ever discovered by the greater mass of people, there'd be many more shootings. Your typical leftard is an irresponsible douchebag who never wants to have, nor ever expects, to be in a position of power, but having found himself there decides he might as well do his best to remake society according to his own tastes -- the better to guarantee his own position and comfort. He never thinks through the consequences of what he advocates, because he never expects to actually be held responsible for them.

To paraphrase Orwell, there is no group of people in existence which serves so little useful function than the Left-wing intelligentsia (itself a contradiction in terms).

Anyways, let's get to another, related point -- undoubtedly the greater one -- which is the absolutely piss-poor quality of our Ruling Class, especially In Time of Crisis.

The Political Class in this country is a rogue's gallery of the stupid, the venal, the partisan, the hacks, the hyper-sensitive, the insensitive, the clueless, the brainless and the classless. Within it's ranks you'll find a great many petty dictators and a similar number of apparatchiks and ticket-punchers. There are the illiterate, the invisible, the criminal, and the spastic. A great many of them are infected with the worst sorts of narcissism, compulsive disorders, and anal retention issues. I'd wager half are sex-fiends, and the other half gay, or in love with their cocker spaniels. All are certainly in love with the sounds of their own voices. They can be, generally, counted upon to operate under the premise that "half a loaf is the same as no bread"; anytime a "compromise" is ever reached, it is usually a necessary political tactic by one side or another, or because the issue at hand is of, literally, no worth or consequence, or largely symbolic. In any eventuality, they can be expected to exercise as little reasoned judgement as possible, and display an unerring instinct to do The Absolute Wrong Thing, but usually The Absolute Worst Thing.

But, they are certainly experts in how to spout stupidity (Washington D.C. is the Old Faithful of Crapspeak, I'd bet), what with their petty and ridiculous "no guns within 1,000' of a federal official" bullshit, and pleading for speech codes and new laws against Free Expression -- because that's how Congress always reacts in the wake of a tragedy: they over-react, retroactively, and expensively, then slam the barn door shut long after the horse has shit and run away. It's why you have to get felt up at the airport, after all. The REAL point: that mental patients are roaming the streets and looking to shoot Congresscritters because we can't put them in institutions where they can get help, and we can be made safe from them, is beyond Congresses capacity to see.

Mostly because locking up the loonies would make sense, which is why the Kings, Durbins, and Weiners of the world don't get it. The premise is too clear-cut, too simple, it can't be clouded and obscured by the usual fatuity that passes for political dialogue and debate in this country. As an added obstacle: should the problem of the Jared Loughners ever be solved by legislators, no one individual would be able claim any credit or distinction for it; the public at large would simply believe that was what Congress should have been doing all along, and why the hell should someone get a pat on the back for simply doing his job? In American politics, if there's no "giving" of something special to your voting bloc -- whether it's Prayer in Public Schools and Free Flame Throwers for Everyone on one side, or Free Medical Insurance and Unfettered Free Abortions For All on the the other -- then it just doesn't get done.

Hence, the puerile argument over crosshairs, heated rhetoric, talk radio, and Left-and-Right-this-that-and-the-other. It's all designed to cover the fact that neither side knows what the fuck it's doing, has any clue as to what it should be doing, nor has any sense of decency. If they had any intention of getting anything done, or the ability to do it, there'd be money for mental hospitals.

These people are now frightened to death; the mid-term elections put fear into their bellies, democrat and republican, alike. And now they're also having to face the possibility that they might be hunted down in public by lunatics -- lunatics they've largely let loose with their policies, by the way -- and they've gone hysterical. They don't know what to do about it, and you can actually see them squirming, if you look close enough. The democratic party's "cool it" rhetoric is similar to how one would speak when confronted by a mugger "okay, pal...take it easy....I'm getting my wallet...just be cool...don't ass-rape me, please?". The republican reaction is also typical; play politics, badly, assume the position of Martyrs, and try to position yourself on both sides of the fence (they call this "bi-partisanship" or "being above the fray") hoping that you don't scrape your scrotum on the barbed wire you're straddling.

Somebody ought to remind Rep. King of the existence of the Second Amendment ,and that gun rights are one of the planks in the GOP platform. His is one of the dumbest and most self-serving, and nakedly transparent ideas to come down the pike since John Kerry's infamous "I voted against it before I voted for it" word vomit. You can't have it both ways, Congressman.

If you ever needed a clearer example of just what is wrong with this country, then you got a snootfull this past weekend; idiotic politician, clueless media, and gun-toting mental patient all came together to make a splendid mess, one that exposes the foundation of absolute crap upon which the American Political System is currently built.

"Princess Boys"...

This is what happens when you treat your children as a fashion accessory,or project your unfulfilled dreams and aspirations upon them, and you encourage behavior in them for the purposes of writing a freakin' book, because that's easier than working for a living.


You are not a parent; you are a little girl playing at Barbie Dolls...with Penises. Which, I'm led to understand that Barbie's supposedly-hetero-male counterpart, Ken, does not have.

Now, does letting your son wear a dress and forcing him to take ballet classes against his will for your own personal edification produce a well-adjusted child?

Take a look at the potential future mayor of Chicago, and you tell me.

But, I digress...

feel sorry for this little boy, because he obviously has a mother who is a dumbass, and one is left wondering "Where the fuck is this kid's father?", and, "Why hasn't he smacked the shit out of his Baby Momma yet?"

Now, kids go through phases; we all know this. It's quite possible this child will outgrow his passion for pink and purple frilly things. I certainly hope that he does, but it's going to be difficult when his mother is a pretentious moron with a political agenda, and less native intelligence than one normally associates with a garden snail. She's found herself a Golden Goose in our therapeutic culture, and one gets the impression that we have another ersatz "expert" in the making; you know, those people the newsdouches turn to for answers to obscure questions on obscure subjects that no one wants answered, but that some idiot producer thinks would make an awesome "human interest" story.

"Mom" is in the process of making a career for herself out of her child's idiosyncracies. In any context except within the touchy-feely world of the drum-circle-diversity-inclusion industry, this would be called "exploitation".

Watching this video, it's obvious that the mother is little more than this kid's puppet master: she has to encourage the kid to speak (almost like she's giving him permission to do so) when Meredith Viera (damn that woman still looks good after all these years) asks him a question, and then usually ends up answering it for him. Edgar Bergen was a rank amateur compared to this doofus, who should be taken out and shot for the rankest and most egregious child abuse.

Seriously, if your boys are wearing dresses, and it ain't for the school play, or a Halloween costume, and they're above the age of 3; you've got a problem.

Normal parents who recognize their child has a problem take them to doctors, or take corrective action on their own. They don't write look-at-me books and go on the Today Show.

(H/T JammieWearingFool).

Mercy, Please!

Watching Obama's speech. First thing that struck me was that for the first time in two years, SOMETHING wasn't George W. Bush's fault. Obama came out and said those words which must have hurt more than a double root canal without anesthetic, executed via the rectum:

"I take responsibility..."

The rest of the Speech makes it perfectly clear that he still believes that we're all clueless dolts who were just too darned impatient for our good, and then followed up with a rambling diatribe about"Energy Policy", never once mentioning the words "Drill". Whatever else might happen, Obama is not going to give up on Cap and Trade. Someone still hasn't learned their lesson, methinks.

The rest of the speech went something like this:

"Blah, blah, blah...blah,blabbity-bloobity, blah blah, blah..."

Even the customary Washington Press Corps Q&A was boring, and indicative that no one who should knows just what the fuck happened to Obama last night. Including him.

All I could hear during this hour-plus gabfest was that Obama still doesn't get it, and that he's probably set to dig his heels in deeper. Get your popcorn ready; this one's gonna be good.

They Didn't Understand It In 1776, Either...

The BBC Misunderstands the Tea Party Movement.

History repeats itself, and the British government (the BBC is, after all, government-funded) fails to see what is so plainly before their noses.