Even More New Anti-Romney Ads on the Horizon...

In response to the enormous popularity of this post, I have crafted some more new Anti-Romney ads the lying Obama campaign machine will be unleashing on the public any day now. Enjoy!

Welcoming Some New Friends...

Lots and lots of traffic these last few days from a bunch of really cool sites that shall be added to the Wall of Shame. Visit our new friends regularly, or else.

The first new friends are The Hostages. Great site, lots of useful info and humor, and a really good read.

Next, we have The Daily Timewaster, which pretty much sums up my entire blogging career to date. Go and read something and engage your brain.

Finally, we have a blog belonging to one of our Inmates, BeeSting, called Americans Stand With Israel, which is both a wonderful sentiment and a goddamned good idea. Some pretty good stuff there, go read it.

Thanks much for linking to the Asylum! We appreciate the recognition and the traffic!

New Obama Anti-Romney Ads To Look Out For...

"Mitt Romney killed my kittens!", exclaims little Mary Ellen Dumbrovski (left), of Chillicothe, Ohio, adding "he's a big, dumb, meanie snothead, too!"

Mary Ellen's story is not uncommon here in Chillicothe. You see, this is how Bain Capital destroyed a middle American town in the name of greed, and in the process, broke a little girl's heart.

You see, the Dumbrovski ancestral family home, a double-wide trailer provided by FEMA when the Dumbrovski's escaped the carnage of the evil George W. Bush's destruction of New Orleans by a Pentagon-generated Hurricane Katrina, sat on land that Mitt Romney's Bain capital had bribed the then-controlled-by-republicans State Legislature to acquire in order to build the brand new, state-of-the-art Chillicothe International Airport, Golf Resort and European Day Spa, all of which are only open to the Richest One Percent in America.

No sooner had Mary Ellen's family been evicted and relocated to one of the Bain-Capital-run tent camps/soup kitchens located in various, undisclosed locations, where prisoners were fed infrequently on government-surplus cheese, filthy non-EPA-approved water and refused subsidized birth control, than the bulldozers overran the once-pristine trailer park near the interstate and Carter-Era toxic waste dump, and crushed Mary Ellen's two kittens (Trixie and Dixie), who, because of GOP-backed budget cuts lacked state-funded medical insurance to treat their chronic leprosy, and therefore, were unable to get out of the way of the steamrollers with 'Bain Capital' emblazoned on their sides in gaudy neon lettering. Trixie and Dixie are now a permanent feature of runway Three-Niner West.

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Now You Know Why Everything Seems So Fucked Up...

(H/T to my friend Jannetta in Kanopolis!)

The Anticipation is Killing Me...

I hate waiting. I am the most impatient man, I think, the world has ever known. Particularly when it comes to having to wait in order to rid myself of a nuisance.

Why is it that time flies when we're having fun, but absolutely crawls when it comes to getting rid of  bad presidents?

This agonizing wait is reminiscent of those days of early childhood, when Christmas couldn't come soon enough, and when an afternoon was sometimes spent in anticipation of a visit from the Ice Cream truck. The bells and tinny music would be audible for miles before the truck actually arrived, and you wondered if the truck would ever get here so that you could buy your Bomb Pop and a Yoo-Hoo

The Metamorphosis, Part Two...

RE: My seemingly doomed quest to get myself a New York State-issued photo identification card.


I left this tale, oh gentle reader, in that most precarious of states; at a point where I had planned to pin my seemingly ever-fleeting hopes to the possibility that it would be possible to use the bureaucracy in order to fight the bureaucracy.

Here's what has transpired since.

Bloomberg Unhinged...

Apologies: I had meant to get to this earlier, but shit happens and all that.

Okay, so it would seem that New York City Mayor Micheal Boomdouche...errm...Bloomberg...has finally lost his last sodding marble, and has extended his food fetishes to baby Formula. It's bad enough the New York City school system won't educate the little tykes when they get old enough to attend, now Bloomberg wants to see them starving, too.

Some More Thoughts on the Olympics...

My last post on the Olympics can be read here.

Today I'd like to talk about the distinction to be made between what I consider REAL sports, those events that are simply games, and others which can be considered pastimes. I will then ask the relevant questions (beginning with "How the fuck did this become an international competition?", or "Are you gay/crazy/in need of a good beating to consider this worthy of a competition and this sort of expenditure of taxpayer funds?").

I'm not completely certain, but I think I once heard something along similar lines from George Carlin, so I apologize in advance if I only manage to repeat things George said.

Some Thoughts on the Olympics…

I was forced to watch the opening ceremonies of the 2012 London Olympics last night.

Tess was all excited by the thought of the spectacle, and got into one of those passive-aggressive moods of hers, in which failure to comply with her wishes – in this case, that we “enjoy” something that I find about as interesting as dry toast, and about as exciting as a case of toenail fungus – as “a couple”.

This is, after all, she tells me, what “couples do”.

She gets into these moods, with this sort of strange ideal surrounding it, every so often, and rather than have to deal with the complete bullshit (the expression of which ranges from the emanation of a simple “attitude” all the way up to “full Menstrual Fury”), it’s easier to give in, keep my mouth shut, and make her happy, just to spare myself the additional pain of all the “if you loved me, you’d make an effort…” nonsense.

Women…can’t live with ‘em, and you can’t kill ‘em…

A Nod to Some Local Bloggers...

I'd like to call your attention to two blogs that I've recently been introduced to that are written by my fellow Staten Islanders. I want to make it clear that that I agree with neither writer on most things, but, it is important that we do occasionally take stock of someone else's point of view, if only for our own education.

The first blog is Strangers in a Picture, which takes a bleeding-heart liberal view of well...just about everything. I normally would not spend much time reading this sort of stuff, but it is interesting in this regard: it's nice to know what the entitlement class thinks, or even if it thinks, at all. I do not mean this to be a knock on the author, but rather upon her apparent political philosophy. Give it a look see, just to be nice, huh?

The second blog is The Staten Island Wolf, which from what I gather, is the Principled Anarchist's view of things. Truth to tell, I know just about jack-diddly-squat about Anarchy-the-political-philosophy , but the author here at least makes some attempt to put it into a reasonable context so that even an non-indoctrinated doofus like me can make sense of it. This blog at least has something interesting to say.

I'll be putting them up on the Wall of Shame for anyone who may be interested.

And they say Staten Islanders are dumb? Look, some of us can actually write!